


The Sweetest Corrosion

by TheNightshadeDeluxe



Category: Big Bang (Band), GTOP (Band), K-pop
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-08-13
Packaged: 2018-06-05 15:14:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6710029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNightshadeDeluxe/pseuds/TheNightshadeDeluxe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jiyong and Seunghyun dance around their true feelings until Jiyong takes matters into his own hands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

After the show, the boys were back in their hotel rooms still amped up and nowhere near ready for sleep. 

Seungri had arranged transport for the five to a party with some friends on the other side of town. If management or any of the co-ordi noonas caught wind of it, the idea would be shut down quicker than it had been formed so it had to be kept on the down low. Not an easy feat with the number of people constantly around and needing to be across every second of their lives, so plans and deals needed to be made on the quiet. They had to make sure it wouldn’t get back to anyone; the last thing they needed was for their unscheduled night out to be broadcast to the world at large tomorrow. It was a massive undertaking to take some time out for a little fun but it would be worth it.

The five arranged to meet in the hotel car park, making sure to leave their rooms once everyone else had left and at slightly different times so as not to arouse suspicion. They piled into the van, their driver the only one in on the plan and sworn to absolute secrecy. Once cash had exchanged hands and his confidence was secured, Seungri gave the driver the necessary directions and they were on their way.

*

Seungri announced their arrival with an excited flourish as if any of them were meant to know exactly where they were. Four looked at him with blank expressions and he turned away, waving an exasperated hand at them complaining that they didn’t appreciate the things the maknae did for his hyungs. 

As they climbed out of the van, all very unsure of where they were and what to expect, Jiyong needed a few more assurances that the driver wasn’t going to abandon them or spill the beans to another soul. He laid out a few more crisp bills in large denominations for the man just to be on the safe side. Daesung clapped Jiyong on the back and laughed reminding him that they’d be okay. Jiyong needed to be extra sure. It would be his head on the guillotine if the barest whisper of tonight’s escapades got out.

Feeling only a little more secure about their situation, he followed Seungri and the others to the non-descript house on the outskirts of town and hoped for the best. From the outside, there were no visible or audible signs of a party going on. That Seungri was a clever little fucker, more than the others gave him credit for. Jiyong smiled as slung an arm around the maknae’s shoulder, squeezed him tight and thanked him. Seungri’s face split into a wide self-assured grin as he led them around to the back of the house and into the evening’s festivities.

*

Jiyong and Seunghyun had taken quite a few hits from the joints being passed around until their minds were fuzzy and slow, bodies wilted and boneless. They had found an empty bedroom and lay sprawled on their backs on the king-size bed with their feet hanging off the edge, giggling – and sometimes launching into gut busting hysterics – at the random and extremely hilarious things rolling around their addled brains and whatever eventually made its way out of their mouths into the microcosmic world of the two of them in this room, on this bed.

Seunghyun turned to face Jiyong who was still blissfully spreadeagled. He reached over and ran a finger along the top of Ji’s brow to shift some pink bangs out of his eyes. The touch left a trail of fire across Ji’s brow and a small sigh escaped his lips. Seunghyun shuffled in closer as Ji closed his eyes, humming low, the sound reverberating through his chest.

Seunghyun’s breath fanned down the long column of Jiyong’s throat, as he lay next to him, listening to his leader humming. The feeling of Seunghyun’s rhythmic breathing against Jiyong’s skin made his breath kick up a notch, he slowly opened his eyes and he turned to look at his hyung.

Seunghyun met his eyes and a small smirk played on his lips. For Jiyong the effect was utterly devastating. He felt his chest expand with a flood of warmth and he couldn’t help but smile back at his beloved hyung. Seunghyun laced his fingers in with Ji’s and slid in closing the remaining gap between them. Ji wasn’t keen on making a big thing of it, but the warm fuzz clouding his brain didn’t mind that it was happening and his stomach did slow little somersaults in static anticipation.

The rhythmic sweep of Seunghyun’s breath against Ji’s lips made him a little delirious and it was the only thing he could focus on. Ji closed his eyes again, his breath now coming in short, ragged gasps. Ji didn’t dare open his eyes lest the spell be broken, and before long they’d relaxed into the rhythm of their breathing. It seemed to be the most natural thing in the world; something they’d always done and always would. Seunghyun made his move and closed the millimetres between them brushing Ji’s full lips with his own – languorous and delicate.

Jiyong’s body refused to move, unable to react in the moment as he wallowed in the delicate feel of Seunghyun’s warm lips against his own. Once his brain had registered that he needed to react to being kissed by his beautiful hyung, to move, to do something, he forced his leaden tongue into moving and lapped at the swell of Seunghyun’s bottom lip. Seunghyun deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding against Jiyong’s, roaming the slick inner perimeter of his lips, moving past his teeth. Soft moans were drawn from both men as their mouths moved against each other’s. Seunghyun took his time, the movement of his tongue slow and focussed as he cupped Ji’s face and the younger man followed his lead, languishing in the unhurried pace of their kiss. Ji didn’t want it to end, breathing be damned.

They kissed for what felt like hours before they came up for air. Both men’s cheeks flushed as Youngbae burst into the room slurring an announcement about them leaving before chuckling and staggering off again, slamming the door behind him as if to emphasise his point. Jiyong pulled Seunghyun back down into another slow kiss, a sibilant moan escaping him as Seunghyun caught his bottom lip between his teeth and gently pulled away. He quickly moved in again to slowly run his tongue along the inside of Jiyong’s bottom lip. Jiyong wanted more but he knew they had to go back. Disappointment burned like cold fire in his veins at the thought of going back to their regularly scheduled lives.

Jiyong reluctantly pushed Seunghyun back quietly reminding him that they needed to leave, eyes downcast, bottom lip sucked in behind his teeth. Seunghyun slid his body in against Jiyong and rasped a quiet “okay,” against the shell of Jiyong’s ear before moving to place a kiss on his cheek. Jiyong shuddered and Seunghyun moved to mould his lips against Jiyong’s again, pecking at them slowly repeating the motion time and time again before ending his gentle assault on Jiyong’s mouth and rolling onto his back.

The boys finally hauled themselves up from the bed, a somewhat Herculean effort given their state unstable and dazed, lips kiss-swollen and faces flushed. Jiyong would have loved nothing more than to shove the elder man back onto the bed and kiss him utterly senseless before— He let the thought trail off and sighed as he made his way to the door. Seunghyun grabbed his wrist almost spinning him on his heel as he laced his fingers in with Jiyong’s again and quickly kissed the back of his hand, an adoring smile playing at the corners of his mouth, obsidian eyes conveying his adoration.

Jiyong didn’t know what any of it meant, his mind swimming in its soporific haze and his lips still tingling with the memory of Seunghyun’s against his only moments earlier. Even through the soupy haze curling around his heart he knew he’d tasted heaven and wouldn’t be able to stop wanting more. One taste of Seunghyun was never going to be enough and the way he was looking at him right now sure as hell wasn’t making the task of walking out of here any easier. 

Before his thoughts could drag him further into unchartered territory, he opened the door and lead them through the house, quickly thanking their hosts before the two stumbled out into the night to find the others waiting. Daesung, Seungri and Youngbae tried to keep their voices down, sniggering behind their hands and loudly shushing each other in the silence of the all-encompassing night. Jiyong and Seunghyun followed them, all staggering in their various states of inebriation, to the waiting van that would whisk them back to their hotel and their punishing schedules.

Within minutes, the other three were passed out and tangled together in various combinations in the van. Youngbae had fallen asleep with his head against the pillar with Daesung and Seungri arms linked, snuggled and slumped in behind him. Seunghyun pulled Jiyong down into a spooning position with both lying on their sides, his arms wrapped around the smaller mans waist, fingers intertwined and legs entangled.

Before sleep claimed them both, Seunghyun laid a small trail of kisses at the nape of Jiyong’s bared neck and whispered low enough for only Jiyong to hear: “Please don’t forget tonight.” Jiyong suppressed a small shiver before he slipped into unconsciousness with Seunghyun’s words wrapped around his heart.


	2. Chapter Two

Months had passed and it was another day spent in the studio. As Jiyong waited for everyone to get their act together in the recording booths, his mind wandered as it tended to do when he was waiting. It always took a torturous turn but he went with it if that's what his fate was to be now.

Seunghyun’s quiet plea from the first night they kissed was forever emblazoned across Jiyong’s heart and memory: “Please don’t forget tonight”. It replayed in his mind like a sacred, and ultimately torturous, mantra. It seemed that Seunghyun was the one who had forgotten his own words and Jiyong was now something to play with when his inhibitions were at their lowest.

They’d shared a handful of drunk and stoned kisses since that night and it was all Jiyong could think about. Seunghyun merely brushed it off as a thing that they sometimes did, but dammit if Jiyong didn’t want more of it without the haze of drugs or alcohol clouding the moment. The first time was just over a year ago (yes, he remembered the date) but Seunghyun had made his position on the matter more than clear the last time, so Ji didn’t pursue it.

The last time they were together (kiss number six, and yes, he was counting) was the one that burned brightest in his memory. They were out celebrating Seunghyun’s birthday at a nightclub in Kangnam and it was the last time he’d had any kind of intimate contact with him. Seunghyun decided to make his position abundantly clear and Jiyong had no choice but to respect it.

For the supposed good of the group and to the detriment of his own heart and mind, he would walk away from what he wanted the most...

 

*

 

_Seunghyun’s birthday_

Jiyong turned up to the club an hour after the others. By the time he’d arrived and been escorted to their private function room, everyone was getting into the full swing of things. Seungri was lining up shots along the bar and badgering his hyungs and any of the guests in close vicinity to partake with him. 

Jiyong felt a presence behind him; arms hooked in around his waist, a gentle lingering kiss at his nape made him close his eyes and smile. Seunghyun. Jiyong spun to face him with Seunghyun’s arms still around him as he smiled up at the birthday boy.

Seunghyun smiled at his leader, “You made it.” 

“Wild horses couldn’t drag me away. Not that they’d dare try,” Jiyong replied an easy smile spreading across his face. Seunghyun’s smiled widely down at Jiyong, a small groan caught in his throat that he tried to pass off as a cough. Jiyong cast his eyes down as he bit his bottom lip, god Seunghyun could be an insufferable dork sometimes. He was also unbelievably adorable.

“You look beautiful tonight, dear leader,” Seunghyun husked low against Jiyong’s ear, warm breath fanning down his neck as he took the opportunity to catch the younger man's earlobe between his teeth. Jiyong quickly pulled away and swatted his arm playfully to conceal the electric jolt is sent directly to his groin and the shiver skimming across the surface of his skin.

“Hyung! People will see!”

Seunghyun looked around and shrugged.

“So what if they do? They might actually learn something,” he teased. Jiyong’s pulse quickened at the lascivious grin Seunghyun directed at him. Fucker always knew how to get under Jiyong’s skin, not like he wasn’t already.

Jiyong laughed and pushed him away before moving back in and getting inappropriately close.

“Alright, birthday boy. Slow your roll. We’ve got all night and you will be made to pay for your transgressions.” Jiyong’s voice was low and steady, his eyes focussed on Seunghyun’s lips as he spoke, moving his head as if he were about to kiss him in the bar with everyone watching. Jiyong was close enough to Seunghyun that all he would have had to do was pucker his lips and there would be contact.

Jiyong turned and walked away leaving Seunghyun to his own devices. He cast a glance over his shoulder as he made his way to the bar. Seunghyun was left standing, mouth slightly agape before someone was in front of him again wishing him a happy birthday and the spell was broken. Jiyong made his way over to Seungri, who latched on to his leader for dear life almost choking him in his unbridled excitement. They downed a few shots together and toasted Seunghyun from afar.

As the night wore on and guests departed, leaving only the hardiest of partygoers in their stead and as more drinks were imbibed, Daesung and Youngbae decided that the maknae needed a ride home. The copious shots were starting to make their presence known and he was getting beyond messy. They bid their farewells to Seunghyun and Jiyong who were merrily kicking on. Jiyong asked that they text when they got Seungri home, just to be sure they were all home safe.

After the others left, Seunghyun sat back on the leather couch arms spread across the back and to Jiyong he was every inch the earthly embodiment of Eros. Jiyong was utterly transfixed by his devastating beauty, he was fucking magnificent and the bastard knew exactly how to get Jiyong lit up like the surface of the sun. Seunghyun arched an eyebrow and flashed a deliciously feline smirk at him, his dark eyes glittering in the dim light. Within seconds, Ji was straddling his lap, kissing him roughly, fingers tangled in his hair and grinding against him like they were the only two people in the place. He no longer fucking cared.

Seunghyun held him by the waist and rolled his hips up against the man in his lap making Jiyong groan into his mouth. If they weren’t careful, things were going to escalate and then everyone would really have something to talk about. Jiyong reluctantly broke the kiss and ordered that Seunghyun follows him in a few minutes time. He sauntered to one of the private booths at the back of the club, Seunghyun’s eyes on him the entire time.

Seunghyun stalked after Jiyong after what he considered being a reasonable amount of time. Jiyong pulled him into a heated kiss as the red velvet curtain closed behind him. Jiyong pushed him back onto the chaise lounge and straddling him, he kissed Seunghyun hard grinding against him for all he was worth. He couldn’t help himself. The alcohol burning in his system made him bolder than he normally would have been and given they’d been in this situation before; Seunghyun wasn’t about to stop him and kissed him back with equal fervour.

Seunghyun flipped them so he was on top of Jiyong, pinning him down on the chaise lounge with his hips, he continued kissing Jiyong tongue exploring the hot warm cavern of his mouth. Jiyong groaned as Seunghyun’s heady scent clouded his senses, the friction from the thrust and grind of his hips making him incoherent, his lips pulling him further down into insanity, hands under his shirt setting his skin alight. Jiyong’s desire for Seunghyun began overtaking his reason and he needed more, so much more than whatever this was.

“Hyung...?” he began through laboured breaths. Seunghyun busied himself planting delicate kisses along his jaw and down his throat and it was starting to unravel him. A muffled “Mmmph” was all he got in response as Seunghyun continued to work his burning flesh, setting his pulse racing as the sensations incapacitated Jiyong’s ability to finish his initial thought. Jiyong resurfaced from his lust-induced haze and forced Seunghyun back again needing to be sure he had his attention.

“Hyung. I need you,” a broken plea more than a statement. Seunghyun didn’t answer or respond but continued nipping at the delicate skin along Jiyong’s throat, hands still working under his shirt skating across the hard flesh of his stomach, fingers tracing small delicate patterns as he went.

Jiyong cupped Seunghyun’s face and drew him back up to his eye level. “Did you hear me, Seunghyun?” Seunghyun blinked at him, oblivious to what Jiyong was demanding of him.

“Hear what, my prince?” Seunghyun’s dark eyes, as soft and unfocused as they were, bored into him and Jiyong wanted nothing more than to melt back into his embrace; simply kiss him until he couldn’t feel his lips anymore. But he needed him to know. Eight months of this was becoming too much to deal with on his own.

“Seunghyun,” he whispered low as he closed his eyes, “I need you. Do you understand? I can’t bear this anymore. I can’t. Just being with you like this isn’t enough. I need you, Seunghyun.” Jiyong was baring his soul and Seunghyun just blinked at him, seemingly unable to comprehend what Jiyong was asking of him.

Seunghyun pulled back, extricating himself from Jiyong's embrace. Jiyong felt exposed and raw at the sudden loss of physical contact. Seunghyun stood up and paced the small room. He stopped by the thick curtain and looked at Jiyong, confusion furrowing his brow. With that, he turned on his heel and walked out without another word.

Jiyong ran his hands through his hair and curled in on himself; shell-shocked that Seunghyun had just walked out on him without a word in response. He didn't know what to expect when he'd decided to tell Seunghyun how he felt, but it certainly wasn't this... silence and abandonment. Jiyong’s heart shattered into a million pieces, each jagged little sliver tearing at his insides. He was too numb from the shock of Seunghyun’s sudden disappearing act to cry, to be angry, to feel anything but raw disbelief. 

His phone vibrated in his pocket and he checked it absentmindedly. It was Daesung confirming they’d gotten home and Seungri was OK. Sure. Okay. Good.

He needed to be far away from the calamitous noise that he hadn’t noticed earlier, everything was too loud. The incessant hammering of his aching heart against his ribcage sent adrenaline coursing through his veins like wildfire. Jiyong needed air; it was suddenly too close in this place, too crushing against the burning in his lungs, each breath laboured as he made his way out into the night.

Jiyong made his exit and into a cab home. Jiyong couldn’t face the dorms, not tonight, not if Seunghyun was going to be there. He handed over a stash of bills to the driver not really paying attention to the amount, nor did he care, he was still bewildered at what had transpired. He made his way inside and slammed the door behind him. He made his way to the bathroom by rote, no thought needed about the route he was taking, as the sound of his heart thundered in his ears in the pre-dawn silence of his apartment.

Jiyong undressed his mind not on the task at hand as he dropped his clothes unceremoniously onto the bathroom floor. He turned on the shower and lay curled in the foetal position, the water washing over him as his hot, blinding tears fell unbidden onto the wet tiles at the cold realisation that Seunghyun wouldn’t love him. His stomach purged the remaining alcohol from his system and he watched as it was washed down the drain. He silently prayed for the water to wash away the all encompassing pain that insisted on settling itself into his bones and around his heart like a poisonous barbed veil.

 

* 

 

“Hyoooonnggg!”

The drawn out whine broke his reverie and he swallowed the hot lump in his throat at the memory of Seunghyun’s rejection. The hurt flared and blazed in his chest anew threatening to immolate him from the inside out. Jiyong – the modern day Sita. He let the thought disintegrate as Seungri’s refrain assaulted his ears once again.

“Jiyong-ah! Can we go now?” Seungri whined poking his arm. “I’m going to pass out if we don’t go and eat. Come oooooon, let’s go Jiyoooong! The hyungs are waiting.” They were done for the day, he got through it like he always did. Work until he's too burnt out to feel anything but exhaustion. Today was no different.

Jiyong smiled at Seungri, “Okay! Okay! Fine, let’s go. Couldn’t have that on my conscience now could I? Poor starving maknae,” he pouted as he poked at Seungri’s cheeks playfully before they made their way out of the studio and into the van. It had been a long day, a lot had been accomplished and he was fairly ravenous himself. He squeezed himself past the others and plonked himself in the back of the van, much like he always did these days. He couldn’t look Seunghyun in the eye, the memory was still too raw. It had brought everything flooding back to the surface, the raging torrent threatening to overwhelm his heart.

They found a quiet place to eat, joking about the day’s events and what was next on the agenda while they ate. After dinner and a couple of beers, Jiyong excused himself claiming that he had a headache. He’d head back to his apartment for the night and he’d come back over to the dorms tomorrow. He left some notes on the table before leaving.

He just needed tonight alone to regain his composure.

Tomorrow was always going to be better.


	3. Chapter 3

Sunlight streamed through the curtains and Jiyong woke with a start. He was disoriented and it took him a moment to realise that he was in his own bed at his apartment. The blessed early morning silence should have been his first clue. It was something he had forgotten existed living in the dorms with four other guys. One of those four was destined to annihilate the last remaining threads of his sanity.

At least, that’s what his subconscious mind decided to remind him of all night long. His dreamscape was plagued by a mixture of memories and self-indulgent fantasies of the delicate crush of Seunghyun’s petal-soft lips against his, the silken feel of his skin, his eyes fixing Jiyong with a look that made his insides feel like jelly, the one that told Jiyong in no uncertain terms that he wanted him and only him.

_Goddammit, Seunghyun._

He rolled over and pressed his face into his pillow to stifle the remaining wisps of the dreamlike miasma clouding his mind before making the incredibly difficult decision to lug his sorry carcass out of the warmth of his beloved bed. He could very easily lay here all day replaying the night’s torturous dreams and wallowing in self-pity. As inviting as that sounded, he needed to get moving and get on with things.

Jiyong released a long drawn out sigh at his incessant need to think about Seunghyun as he stumbled into the shower, the one in which he’d lain so despairing and desolate only months before, his tears falling for what felt like endless hours until the water ran cold and his body racked with uncontrollable tremors as his boundless heartache poured out of him.

Thoughts of Seunghyun continued to swirl around him, the smoky tendrils of his dreams lingered as he stepped under the hot spray. Jiyong did his best to shake off the thoughts but his body had other ideas. The agonising dreams – about kissing Seunghyun senseless, the bittersweet memory of his taste lingered on his tongue, the tantalising glide of long slender fingers across his skin, lips and teeth leaving their mark along the inside his thighs – had his cock bristling for attention.

Jiyong slid his hand down his stomach and slowly ran his fingers up along the underside of his cock then down again, his small whimpers ricocheting inside the cubicle making them seem much louder in the small space. Jiyong’s breathing came in short, ragged gasps as he took his hardness in hand, his hips rocking forward as his hand glided along his length in long slow strokes.

His mind wandered and he imagined Seunghyun was with him, wet skin and deliciously toned musculature flush against his back, his tongue laving a trail along the soft flesh of Jiyong’s throat, his fingers trailing heat as they slowly tracked down his stomach and into the dark thatch of pubic hair at the base of his cock.

Thoughts of Seunghyun were setting his skin alight and the speed of his strokes increased creating the friction he desperately needed. He closed his eyes, head snapping back as he visualised Seunghyun taking him in hand. The tantalising thought of Seunghyun’s deliciously long fingers wrapped around his cock had his hips jerking forward as he came hard against the tiles, blinding heat flooding his senses.

Jiyong stood for a long while letting the water wash over him, the post-orgasmic haze fading as his breathing and heart rate normalised. Facing the man he loved every day, particularly one he had to face after he got himself off fantasising about him, was becoming increasingly difficult. He had to get his game face on yet again. Once more into the fray, he thought as he prepared himself to go back to the dorms.

He made himself a large mug of coffee and sat by the window to idly watch the rest of the world wake up as the sun blazed a gentle trail across the morning sky. He let his mind wander as he sipped his coffee, taking his time. He thought about work and what the next few months entailed. After he down the last of his coffee, he grabbed his phone from the kitchen bench and quickly typed out a message to Youngbae to let him know he’d be there within the hour.

As Jiyong’s taxi pulled up to the dorms, Youngbae met him at the door. He pulled Jiyong into a tight hug and asked how he was feeling. Ji smiled at him at promised that he felt better. Jiyong pushed the thought away and smiled at Youngbae. He was going to be just fine.

_Fucking liar._

*

Preparation had commenced for the next round of shows. The endless days and nights in the studio had paid off and they had to turn their minds to taking the show on the road. Days turned into weeks in a flurry of activity: organising and reorganising set lists, planning out choreography, auditioning musicians, dancers, stage hands, electricians; creating lighting rigs, stage dressing, and the endless costume changes that began to resemble what their lives would consist of over the next few months.

It had gotten to the point where Jiyong absolutely hated being in such close proximity to Seunghyun after each practice. The way he looked dripping sweat as he gradually divested himself of the cloying layers, the stupid pranks he pulled on his dongsaengs, the way he could go from being a five-year-old boy to a ludicrously handsome man in the blink of an eye. All of it became increasingly unbearable for Jiyong and the nature of what he was feeling towards Seunghyun was still too raw to handle.

Jiyong could put a brave face on it in the public eye – that was easy. But when they were backstage in the dressing rooms and guards were down, it was too easy for his mask to slip. So he made his excuses for not hanging out with the boys and the crew afterwards. He hated lying to them but the truth was far more painful.

Considering how things were left – unacknowledged and agonisingly unresolved – Jiyong flat out refused to be out with the man wherever alcohol or drugs were involved, given where it would usually lead (all six times, according to his mental count).

Jiyong was committed to treating him like a colleague if that’s how it was going to be, it was the only way he knew how to cope. Act like nothing’s wrong? Sure. He was the all-suffering, non-billowy haute couture coat-wearing king of bullshitting his way through things. Fake it until you make it. Sure, Jiyong had this locked down.

*

Another exhausting day was spent practising their routines in the studio for the string of shows they were about to kick off. Jiyong was able to keep his focus on the work, though some days it was harder than others. He had been able to maintain an air of indifference and nonchalance around his band mates and particularly Seunghyun – even though every infinitesimal fibre of his being yearned to reach out and touch him, pull him close, feel his bare skin against his, the sweet crush of his lips against his own just one more time.

He was quite impressed with his performances, his own acting putting Seunghyun’s to shame. He chuckled to himself as he pushed through the studio doors and out into the drizzly street.

It had been raining hard for most of the day, the city streets shining wetly in the half-light of the late afternoon. Seungri, Youngbae, Seunghyun and Daesung followed suit and climbed into the van behind Jiyong. Jiyong slid into the back seat and slumped against the window, beanie pulled low over his forehead, sunglasses planted firmly on his face – even though it was raining.

He feigned a headache (yet again) so the others would let him be for the trip. A song seemed to suddenly blare from the radio and threatened to obliterate Jiyong’s well-rehearsed façade entirely: 

_“Guess it was not meant to be,_

_But it’s not as bad as it seems,_

_It only burns when I breathe...yeah,_

_You saw the way that I fell,_

_But I’m better off by myself,_

_That’s the tale I like to tell, yeah”_

A poisoned switchblade was ever so gracefully being forced right through the centre of his beleaguered heart and Kwon Jiyong was slowly bleeding out while the world watched on in cold indifference.

He wanted nothing more than to let the floodgates open letting everything spill out of him. Allow his quiet, destructive yearning to be released into the world for all to see. Everyone in the van would be forced to bear witness as he bled his undisclosed desires out, his heart a quivering mass of pulsating viscera, raw and vulnerable. Let Seunghyun see the effect he had on him, see what he’d started and then walked away from.

No. The pragmatic G-Dragon would never let that happen – let them see his weakness. That wouldn’t be the clever or gracious thing to do. Instead, he kept his eyes focussed on the rain-slicked streets around them while his inner turmoil consumed him and he blinked back the hot sting of tears that threatened to slip through.

Seunghyun seemed to be completely oblivious as to how much Jiyong was being corroded from the inside out and he would let it remain that way for as long as he needed to. Jiyong could never tell him. He couldn’t stomach facing up to his rejection in the cold light of day, once was more than enough.

Silently, he thanked the fashion gods for oversized sunglasses. 

*

Once all the shows were finished, the tour concluded and the group were on short hiatus each going their separate ways for a few months of much-needed downtime. Jiyong threw himself into his work in the vain attempts at voiding his head of everything Seunghyun. He was booked for various shoots and promotions and he was thankful for the amount of work on his plate away from the others, away from Choi Seunghyun.

In a cruel twist of the switchblade in his heart, Seunghyun started showing up at photo shoots “for support”. Even though Jiyong appreciated it, in all honesty, it would be so much easier if he just didn’t. Jiyong maintained his smokescreen and acted like Seunghyun wasn’t there. If he wasn’t in his eye line he could at least pretend that it was true.

After weeks of catching glimpses of Seunghyun watching him (when he thought he was being incredibly stealthy) and then immediately glancing away the second Jiyong caught his eye, was driving him insane. Too many photo shoots and interviews had gone down this way with Seunghyun’s beautiful dark eyes burning into him, watching him like a hawk, tongue ghosting across his bottom lip, quiet sighs he believes no-one hears; only to pass it off like it was all in Jiyong’s imagination whenever the subject came up.

Jiyong found Seunghyun’s clandestine attentions nothing short of incredibly fucking distracting. To the casual observer, it may have seemed innocent but Jiyong knew a damn sight better than that.

And Jiyong was beyond done with it.

He had almost come to terms with the fact that they wouldn’t be together and then Seunghyun starts showing up and paying very close attention to every little thing. It didn’t make sense and Jiyong was going to set it straight, whether Seunghyun liked it or not.

He quickly scrawled a note in his dressing room when the shoot finished and purposefully strode towards his intended target. Seunghyun was doing his utmost to melt into the wall behind him, all the while refusing to make eye contact with Jiyong as he closed the remaining distance between them.

Jiyong reached him quickly barely leaving centimetres between their bodies as he forcefully shoved his short missive down into Seunghyun’s hip pocket with such force that Seunghyun was sure every part of him shoved against the wall was going to bruise. Jiyong glared at him fixedly as he stuffed the note into his pocket with two fingers, knuckles grazing Seunghyun’s hipbone as he forced it down.

Jiyong delivered his message in silence, his eyes intently focussed on Seunghyun’s all the while, top lip curled up in a small snarl, bottom lip caught behind his teeth. It was a look he had perfected through thousands of photo shoots, music videos and promotions and he knew it was one that Seunghyun had favoured, tracing his tongue along his bottom lip when he thought no one else could see him.

Jiyong retracted his hand quickly, making Seunghyun flinch and stormed out of the building without so much as a backwards glance. Seunghyun stared after him in stunned silence; his mouth working to form words, syllables, anything but they failed to materialise as his world shifted and tilted on its axis.

He remained in place for a few moments, feeling a small bruise forming on the back of his skull. Once he’d regained some composure, he dug the note out of his pocket and read the forcefully delivered message:

_S,_

_Meet me at my apartment, 6.30pm sharp. We need to talk. Don’t be fucking late._

_J._

The four little words “we need to talk” made the blood fizz in his veins. He’d been far too obvious and this could only mean one thing.

Jiyong knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song referred to in the chapter is Adam Lambert's gorgeous "Can't Let You Go" from his first album: For Your Entertainment. There were so many choices for songs but I thought this one summed up what Jiyong was feeling rather perfectly.


	4. Chapter 4

Seunghyun had arrived at the latest of Ji’s photo shoots, coffee in hand and stood at the back of the room. Often, he would sneak in well after the shoot has started and would do his utmost to keep out of the way, stay as quiet as a church mouse. He would watch, enthralled, as Jiyong posed and pouted, posturing his lithe body like he was making love to the world beyond the lenses trained on him. Seunghyun let his eyes glide intricate paths over him, trying to capture every minute detail to commit it all to memory.

Somehow, Jiyong always seemed to know he was there like a bizarre sixth sense. It was as though he could feel the weight of his stare, each lingering gaze, but Jiyong would continue working as if he wasn’t there at all. Today, the atmosphere was different. It seemed as though Jiyong resented him being there altogether. There was something in the way Jiyong regarded him whenever he caught his eye. Agitated. Cold.

Seunghyun knew then that the jig was decidedly up. 

*

After Seunghyun registered what had just happened and he was able to convince his limbs to move, he detached himself from the wall. He was tempted to check if he’d left a physical imprint behind from the force of Jiyong pinning him against it. He could still feel his physical presence against him, his memory imprinted with the image of Jiyong stalking toward him, the delirium-inducing heat radiating from him as he delivered his message. Seunghyun closed his eyes and sighed. 

As a matter of course, he checked his watch. It was 5:47. Jiyong’s message demanded that he be at his apartment at 6:30 sharp. Don’t be fucking late, it said. Seunghyun smirked in spite of himself. Jiyong knew him all too well. Not 6:38, not 6:53 but 6:30 on the dot. He folded the note again and stuffed it back into his pocket and walked out into the bustling city.

Rain was on the way again. Seunghyun needed to clear his head and decided to walk the few short blocks to Jiyong’s apartment.

*

Seunghyun brought his hood up over his head; cap pulled down low, zipper pulled up as far as it could go his hands stuffed into his pockets. He kept his head down to avoid being recognised, not that it mattered. People were running to and fro to avoid the rain so paid him no mind, their own need to keep dry driving them out of the drizzle while he maintained his pace.

The rain was a blessed relief after the stifling heat of the day and he took small pleasure walking beneath the swollen grey clouds as they lazily divested themselves of their aqueous cargo. It gave him pause; time to reflect on things between himself and Jiyong as he meandered through the streets on his way to Jiyong’s.

To Jiyong, he corrected himself.

The reason he was going to Jiyong’s – We need to talk – resounded in his mind like a tolling bell. This was the one confrontation he’d been actively avoiding. Avoiding it because he didn’t know how he was going to maintain any kind of composure once Jiyong laughed in his face for being such a pathetic fucking loser and told him exactly all the ways in which he could fuck off. He could almost taste his contempt and repulsion.

Seunghyun sighed. The Sword of Damocles hung above him and Jiyong was about to cut the thread. Seunghyun felt like he needed time to work through what everything meant and how he was going to survive when the inevitable blow was dealt. That day was here and time was up.

Jiyong had made that much clear.

*

By the time Seunghyun had arrived at Jiyong’s apartment, the gentle rain had soaked him through. The route was seemingly etched into his muscle memory; he’d barely needed to look up the entire way. He checked his watch once he’d made it through all the security checks, caught the elevator to his floor and finally stood at Jiyong’s door. It was 6:23pm, a few minutes to spare. The thought of waiting out the extra time made his stomach lurch and set the razor-winged butterflies angrily working against his insides again. He had to face this no matter how much it was going to hurt.

Seunghyun drew in a stabilising breath, releasing it in a slow exhale as his eyes closed. His hand moved of its own volition; his body seemed to tacitly understand the mission he was preparing for. He knocked four times, stood back and waited. Anticipation coiled and flexed constricting his lungs with each breath.

Endless seconds passed before the door swung open. Jiyong stared at him wide-eyed. First, he was early. Seunghyun was rarely early, let alone on time to anything. Ever. Second, he was completely saturated.

“Aish, you’re soaked!”

Seunghyun cast a glance down and looked up at Jiyong from under the wet hood plastered against his cap, which dripped onto the floor in front of him.

“Yep,” he offered, rocking on the balls of his feet, an apologetic smile pulling at the corner of his mouth, his hands stuffed into his pockets. The roiling tension eased momentarily.

Jiyong rolled his eyes and motioned for him to come inside.

“Get in here and dry off,” he insisted, sounding every inch the exasperated leader. “Idiot!” he muttered under his breath, sighing.

Seunghyun trudged the few steps inside and Jiyong closed the door behind him. He toed off his wet shoes at the door as Jiyong disappeared down the hallway, returning with a towel. He tossed it at Seunghyun to dry himself so he wouldn’t drip all over his furniture.

Seunghyun removed the soggy hoodie and cap, which Jiyong dutifully placed in the dryer. He returned to Seunghyun standing in single layers, the towel draped over his head like an opaque shroud. The sight of him drenched through, his deep chocolate eyes conveying a silent apology for dripping water all over his floor made Jiyong’s heart ache.

Jiyong knew he had been putting this off for too long. He couldn’t fall back into the habit of denial and detachment that had been his life for so long now, he wasn’t sure he knew how else to be. He would push forward and get through this.

He steeled himself against the burning desire to reach out and hold the object of his destructive longing, instead asking Seunghyun to follow him into the kitchen. Seunghyun looked up from under the towel and dutifully followed his leader down the hallway, letting the towel slip from his dishevelled hair to sit across his shoulders. Jiyong didn’t turn to face him once they’d reached the kitchen.

“Sit,” Jiyong demanded as he pointed at a chair at the kitchen table.

Seunghyun silently did as he was asked slipping the towel over the back of the chair. Jiyong sat across from Seunghyun, hands clenched together on the table in front of him, his face unreadable; eyes stony in their appraisal of him. It made Seunghyun’s blood run cold and he swallowed hard, his fingers worrying the hem of his shirt as he waited. His anxiety increased with each passing second as the pregnant silence stretched on.

“Ji—“ he started, the deep timbre of his voice surprisingly unobtrusive in the overwrought silence. Jiyong cast Seunghyun a withering glare and merely shook his head effectively cutting him off. Seunghyun slumped back in his chair, eyes downcast, and his mouth forming a hard line.

Living in a state of fluctuating ambiguity did not sit well with Jiyong. He needed answers and he was going to get them, no matter how long it took. Seunghyun was not leaving until he knew definitively where he stood. In devastation or bliss, at least he would know. He knew if he let Seunghyun speak first, his resolve would falter and he couldn’t let that happen.

Jiyong needed to start somewhere, his latent fury finally finding its voice and the words he’d been longing to say shot out of him in an adrenalised torrent:

“Why did you kiss me in that back room that first time, looking at me the way you did, asking me not to forget then conveniently acting like it never happened? Why have you been turning up to where I 'm working for fuck sakes to observe from the sidelines and continue to act like it’s nothing?”

Jiyong pushed his chair back and began pacing in the small space in front of Seunghyun, his eyes never leaving him, before continuing.

“You started this, Seunghyun. You started something and you only wanted it when it suited you. It was only ever on your terms. Always when we were under the influence, so you wouldn’t have to face the reality of your actions. You’d have an easy out.”

Jiyong continued to pace as he laid his cards on the table, Seunghyun watching him, his eyes widening, unable to respond to Jiyong’s charges. Jiyong stopped pacing and faced him dead on, his eyes boring into him. Seunghyun merely stared back at him in mute shock.

“You poisoned me, Seunghyun. Infected me with this heartache because all I wanted after the first time was more. And there was more... until there wasn’t. You left me when I opened up to you. Walked out on me without a single, solitary fucking word!” Jiyong’s voice trembled on the last.

“You did this and you left me,” he said, all traces of malice and anger evaporated from his voice leaving quiet despair in its wake as his mute tears fell.

Seunghyun still couldn’t find the words. Jiyong was admitting something he couldn’t comprehend. He had prepared himself for the absolute worst but had never anticipated that this would be what Jiyong would say. His breath caught in his throat and he swallowed thickly as he watched the tears stream down Jiyong’s face. He watched helplessly as the anger and pain spilled out of his beautiful leader.

Seunghyun’s heart sunk at seeing Jiyong’s tears, his own tears pricking at the back of his eyes. Jiyong’s words hit home like heat-seeking missiles, each one exploding rapid-fire against his own beleaguered heart.

Seunghyun couldn’t look at Jiyong, hot tears stinging his eyes as he spoke, his voice steady and calm.

“Ji, I never wanted to leave you. I wanted you more than you could possibly know. I didn’t believe it was real. Couldn’t believe that you would ever want me. Not you. Not like that, never in the way I needed you most. That would be too much to hope for.”

Jiyong was incredulous. He couldn’t be hearing this right. Couldn’t be. His beloved Seunghyun could not be telling him—? He needed to be sure.

“The night you left me in Kangnam. You remember? That night... you walked out on me. No words, not so much as a backwards glance. What the fuck was that, Seunghyun?” Jiyong felt the acrid sting of bile rising along with the bitter memory. He choked back a sob as the hurt resurfaced, the way it always did.

“Of course, I remember, Ji. I thought you were playing with me. Playing with me the way you do with everyone.”

It was true that Jiyong was a notorious flirt, but he would never do that to him. Not Seunghyun. Jiyong covered his mouth with his hands, shaking his head in disbelief. It hurt more knowing that Seunghyun thought he was merely playing him, that he believed his words that night were anything but sincere.

Seunghyun continued, his expression quiet, eyes still downcast.

“Kangnam was another level of heartbreak. I wanted you so badly and I knew you had to be fucking with me when you said you needed me. It was the cruellest twist of the knife and it fucking destroyed me, so of course I left. I wasn’t going to wait around for the other shoe to drop.”

Seunghyun’s words were like a physical blow to Jiyong. Christ. Jiyong choked out a quiet “No-no-no-no-no-no,” he felt sick at what he was hearing, he squeezed his eyes closed to hold back the dam that was threatening to burst out of him. How could he have been so blind?

“And I started this because I—“ Seunghyun swallowed hard and leant forward, elbows on his knees, hands clasped in front of him, training his eyes on the floor in front of him. He closed his eyes and his brimming tears spilt over. He cleared his throat before starting again.

“I waited until we were stoned or drunk or affected by some substance or other because it was the only way I could build up the courage to touch you, to draw you near, to hold you. And that first time, the very first time,” a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, the bittersweet memory of the first time he kissed Jiyong washing over him.

He drew in a shaky breath before continuing: “That first time, when you didn’t push me away or treat me like a freak for kissing you, I didn’t know what else to do. I couldn’t talk to you about it because it still didn’t seem real, it was a fevered dream, I don’t know. The truth is, I was so scared, Jiyong. Fucking terrified to the core that you’d think I was ridiculous for reading too much into it. So I backed off, played it off like it was nothing because I believed that’s what you wanted. You could never have wanted any of this,” he sighed heavily, breath catching, as though the weight of his words were too much to bear.

“I pushed you away so I wouldn’t have to deal with you rejecting me.”

Seunghyun’s voice was almost an inaudible whisper, his eyes downcast as tears tracked down his face silently. Jiyong felt like his jackhammering heart was going to burst through his ribcage. All of his pent up frustration bled out of him at Seunghyun’s quiet, heartbreaking confession.

He didn’t know. Neither of them did. They’d borne the burden of shared and separate sorrow, each with their own cross to bear, each pulling in opposite directions.

“That... and the fact that you kept disappearing. You wouldn’t come back to the dorms, wouldn’t face me. You’d avoid being in the same room alone with me. Most times you wouldn’t even look at me, Ji. What was I supposed to think?”

When Seunghyun had finished, Jiyong’s hand still covered his mouth as he stood staring at Seunghyun. He was still in denial and shock at what Seunghyun was telling him. He closed his eyes, wiping at them with the back of his hands and exhaled long and slow.

“Fuck. How did you not get it? How did you not understand?” Jiyong’s voice was quiet and resigned not accusatory. He was angry with himself, how did he not see it?

Jiyong breathed a quiet "Fuck this" as he moved in pushing Seunghyun back in his chair. Seunghyun’s eyes widened as Jiyong straddled his lap, eyes searching his as he cupped Seunghyun’s face. Jiyong pressed his forehead against Seunghyun’s, huffing out a breath against his cheek before spoke again.

“My sweet Seunghyun, you beautiful idiot. How did you not understand this?”

The last word was a barely spoken murmur as Jiyong fused his lips to Seunghyun’s and he melted into Jiyong’s kiss. Their lips began moving slowly against each others, taking in the bottom lip, then the top, then back again, their mouths melding and reforming with each subtle, unhurried movement.

The kiss was undemanding and deliberate as Seunghyun slid his arms in around Jiyong’s waist to pull him in closer, his hands tracing delicate patterns along his spine as their tongues tentatively searched out the others. Small whimpers broke from each of them, the languorous pace an amends for the heartache and sorrow unintentionally inflicted against the other.

I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I need you.

Jiyong broke the kiss and spoke against Seunghyun’s lips: “Do you understand now, hyung?” Seunghyun offered a small, almost imperceptible nod as he flicked his tongue against his lips. Jiyong moved back to gaze into his liquid eyes, hands cupping his face again. Both men’s eyes were red-rimmed and shining with the tears they had shed. Jiyong traced his thumbs along Seunghyun’s cheekbones.

“I love you, Seunghyun. I’ve always loved you, unreservedly and without exception. Please say you understand. I don’t think my heart could take it if you didn’t,” Jiyong pleaded softly, tears continuing their silent path down his face as he leant in to gently brush his mouth against Seunghyun’s again.

Seunghyun gently pulled back from Jiyong and looked up into his honey-brown eyes. He ran a finger along his brow; much like he had the first time he kissed Jiyong. He gently wiped at the wet trails on his cheeks with his thumbs, the sight of his beautiful tear-stained love made his overflowing heart clench. A small smile spread across Seunghyun’s lips, lighting his eyes.

“Yes. Say it again,” Seunghyun’s raspy voice sent pulses of electricity skating across the surface of Jiyong’s skin.

“Good,” Jiyong replied as he leant down to kiss Seunghyun again smiling against him.

“Iloveyou-iloveyou-iloveyou-iloveyou-iloveyou,” Jiyong punctuated his words with rapid, petal-soft kisses between each repetition.

Seunghyun smiled against him, something wild and unfathomable bloomed in his ribcage sending pulsating shockwaves coursing through him, his pulse fluttering each time Jiyong told him he loved him.

“I don’t think I’ll ever tire of hearing you say that,” breathless, he swallowed before looking up into Jiyong’s eyes again.

“I love you so much, Ji.” Seunghyun stroked the side of his face as he spoke making Jiyong feel as though was made of the most delicate porcelain.

Jiyong felt like he was going to explode with unbridled joy. He claimed his lips again unable to contain the overwhelming emotion swirling through him. Seunghyun loved him and it was more than he could ever need.

They kissed until their jaws ached, their lips were tender and kiss-swollen, their breath coming in laboured gasps burning in their lungs and neither could remember which way was up, what time meant.

Jiyong stood on unsteady legs, clasping Seunghyun's hands and Seunghyun immediately missed his slight heft against him.

“So, what happens now?” Seunghyun asked, breathing slightly laboured.

“We’ve already lost too much time not seeing what was right in front of us. Besides,” Jiyong swooped in and flicked his tongue teasingly against Seunghyun’s mouth, his hands resting on Seunghyun’s knees, eyes level; “I hope you weren’t planning on being anywhere that isn’t my bed for at least the next few weeks.” Jiyong sucked his bottom lip in behind his teeth, eyes wide and innocent playing up his coquettishness.

“Let me check my schedule and I’ll get back to you,” Seunghyun offered nonchalantly and smirked, earning him a hard slap against his thigh for his efforts. He pulled Jiyong down into his lap again, kissing him more intensely, tongue laying claim to Jiyong’s mouth as he drew him in igniting his passion. Jiyong ground his hips down against Seunghyun and whimpered into his mouth knowing full well that it would get a reaction.

Seunghyun stood, holding Jiyong in place gripping his waist as he wrapped his legs around him; lips still fused with Jiyong’s, neither willing to relinquish the others. Seunghyun took a few steps before stopping, pulling back and looking askance at Jiyong.

“Which way to the bedroom again?” he husked before delicately trailing kisses along the soft flesh of his throat. A wanton moan broke from Jiyong before he stretched an arm behind him pointing the way.


	5. Chapter 5

Seunghyun pulled Jiyong in for another hungry kiss as he blindly stumbled into Jiyong’s bedroom. His mind reeled at the prospect of being with him as his tongue slid against and around Jiyong’s. Jiyong ground his hips into him and his little whimpers were swallowed by their heated kiss as Seunghyun carried him to the bed. He sat on the edge, Jiyong still straddling him with his ankles locked together behind his back.

Jiyong broke the kiss, fingers tracing the tantalising line of Seunghyun’s jaw and down along his throat, fingers grazing along the edges of exposed collarbone.

He sat back in his lap and held Seunghyun’s heated gaze before speaking.

“I need you, hyung. I need you...” he sighed, fingers skating across Seunghyun’s cheekbone and tangling in his hair as he leant in and breathed against him.

He pulled back to fix him with a ravenous gaze. Seunghyun was hypnotised under Jiyong’s intense scrutiny, his own heat and passion burning bright.

“I need you... to fuck me until I can’t walk,” his voice pure licentious intent, unwavering. With it came a chaste press of his lips against Seunghyun’s cheek.

“Fuck me until I can’t remember my own name,” another sweet press of his lips against the corner of his curving smile.

“How does that sound, baby?” he smouldered, palming Seunghyun’s cock through his pants making him inhale sharply.

Jiyong’s tongue flicked at the seam of Seunghyun’s lips, his teeth catching and pulling at Jiyong’s bottom lip before Seunghyun’s tongue lashed out and dragged him back down into another fiery grazing of lips, teeth and tongue. 

Fuck taking it slow. Jiyong had physically ached for the man beneath him for too long and they were well past any sense of delicacy or decency about their situation. Jiyong didn’t wait for a response before he unlocked his ankles and pushed Seunghyun back onto the bed. Seunghyun’s brows did their best to climb into his hairline as Ji physically pinned him down, surprised by his sudden show of strength as his mouth and tongue savagely laid claim to him again.

Seunghyun couldn’t hide how turned on he was and ground his swelling cock into Jiyong, hands sliding down his sides and taking a firm grip of his arse as he did. Jiyong moaned into his mouth at the contact and took Seunghyun’s teasing thrust as his answer.

Trembling fingers blazed trails across newly discovered valleys and planes of their heated skin as layers were removed and discarded, their mouths seeking and finding each other with increased urgency as their feverish pace articulated their fervent need. Fingers roamed across once familiar and newly exposed flesh as each article of clothing vanished, small breathless whimpers and moans breaking against the shores of their lips.

The rain had picked up as thunder rolled in the distance. The oncoming storm mirrored their intensity as they pitched and swayed against each other. Grinding hips creating the friction they both craved as their machine-gunning hearts pounded and slammed against their skeletal cages, the warm slide of skin on skin setting each of them alight.

As their lips melded, Seunghyun traced his fingers along the Forever Young tattoo inked down Jiyong’s ribs and along his hipbone. His fingers snagged on the waistband of his boxers. His fingers darted along the edge, index finger sliding in behind to tease the heated flesh there making Jiyong drive his hips up into the touch, needing more.

Seunghyun smiled against his lips as he teasingly ran his fingers over and past where Jiyong wanted him most, blatantly refusing to give in to Jiyong’s unspoken demands. His lips and tongue laved a wet trail down his throat momentarily stopping to nip at the thin veil of flesh at his collarbones before continuing down his chest.

Seunghyun stopped his delicate teasing strokes that moved lower across his belly each time as Jiyong rocked against him. He gingerly slipped his fingers in beneath the waistband and down into the dark thatch of hair, Jiyong tensed, bottom lip trapped behind a row of white teeth as Seunghyun finally took him in hand. Seunghyun’s lips latched around a pebbled nipple and Jiyong inhaled sharply through his teeth.

“Mmm, I don’t think we’ll be needing these anymore,” Seunghyun purred low against his chest as his hand travelled up his shaft exposing Jiyong’s hardness.

Jiyong bucked up and Seunghyun used his free hand to divest him of the thin layer of material between them. Jiyong was finally naked beneath him, his flawless beauty made his breath catch in his throat. He swallowed hard at the sight of his nubile splendour laid out before him, all his for the taking as he moved in to reclaim the nipple he’d relinquished.

Seunghyun slithered his tongue across it, teeth delicately pulling as his tongue continued to lash the nub and his hand gently worked Jiyong’s aching hardness. Jiyong’s moans drove Seunghyun on as he trailed slow agonising kisses down, down, down until he positioned himself between his thighs.

Seunghyun took his time planting petal-soft kisses against the pale silk of his inner thighs, teeth nipping as he went and tongue trailing not far behind. He placed his hands beneath the lusciously firm curve of his backside and pulled him forward. Jiyong whimpered under him; brazenly giving himself over to Seunghyun as he spread his thighs further apart to grant him unrestricted access.

Seunghyun continued his gentle assault while Jiyong simmered beneath his dexterous attentions. He slithered his tongue along his perineum before reaching the sensitive spot that made Jiyong quiver. Jiyong’s pitch hit a new octave as Seunghyun swirled his tongue across the delicate area before he started devouring him relentlessly his tongue repeatedly breaching the borderline as his mouth worked him into a state of chaotic arousal while his fingers traced delicious spirals along his shaft.

The stimulation was too much. Jiyong could feel the tightening coil of his impending orgasm.

“You... need to... stop— fuck...I can’t...!” Jiyong spluttered.

Seunghyun slowed his movements before he eventually moved back up Jiyong’s shuddering body, planting delicate kisses as he went. Seunghyun was an acolyte offering supplication to Jiyong, his adored and adoring deity.

“Condoms?” he husked against his throat before branding the soft flesh with his teeth.

Jiyong rasped out a laboured: “Second drawer... on the left.”

Seunghyun maintained his slow stroking pace on Jiyong as he reached into the drawer and quickly found the condoms and lube, dropping them onto the bed before returning his mouth to Jiyong’s.

He flicked the cap of the lube and messily lubricated a finger trailing the slicked digit around Jiyong’s puckered entrance in teasing little circles sending shockwaves of pleasure rippling through him until couldn’t take it anymore. Jiyong begged and implored until he relented and gently slipped his finger inside.

He trailed a teasing swipe of his tongue along Jiyong’s mouth as he slowly drove his finger into him, plunging in and out slowly, his tongue mirroring the action of his pistoning finger, before adding a second. Jiyong writhed against his slowly scissoring fingers, breathing ragged and begging him for more.

Seunghyun was sure he’d come undone from Jiyong’s heat and unrestrained moans alone. He slowly introduced a third and Jiyong bucked against his hand, riding his fingers as he twisted and curled them inside.

“I need you to fuck me. Now. I can’t fucking wait anymore. Fuck me. Please, baby, I can’t...” Jiyong grated against his skin, needy and desperate.

“Are you sure you’re ready for me, sweetheart?” Seunghyun’s heated voice trembled as he continued stretching Jiyong with his fingers, the tight ring of muscle slowly relaxing.

Seunghyun felt like he was going to burst at the seams.

“Please, baby, I need to fucking feel you inside me,” Jiyong growled low as he ran a hand along the underside of Seunghyun’s exposed cock.

Waves of pleasure surged through him at the touch, at Jiyong’s desperate pleas, his eyes falling closed as a small droning whine broke from him.

Seunghyun sat back and prepared himself, rolling a condom down over his own aching erection with slick fingers before applying more lube. He looked down at Jiyong, his body pliant and ready – all for him. Seunghyun’s cock jolted at the sight before he moved in to kiss him adoring and slow. Jiyong moaned against his tongue as the head of Seunghyun’s cock nudged against him.

Seunghyun positioned himself carefully as he pushed into Jiyong at an excruciatingly slow pace. He didn’t want to hurt him no matter how much he had insisted otherwise. Seunghyun’s head dropped into the crook of Jiyong's neck, a drawn out hiss forced out between gritted teeth as Jiyong’s slick heat slowly engulfed him, the resistance and intensity almost unbearable.

Jiyong arched up off the bed with his head thrown back, lips parted and gasping, sheets knotted in his clenched fists as Seunghyun slowly filled him. Jiyong burned beneath him.

Seunghyun stayed in place to let Jiyong get used to the sensation even though it was going against everything in him that wanted to move. He leant in to kiss Jiyong’s again, needing to taste all of him all at once, to reassure his beautiful prince that it wouldn’t hurt for long, that he loved him endlessly. Jiyong released a broken sob into his mouth as his tongue delved deeper.

Seunghyun was overwhelmed, his arousal peaking as Jiyong started moving against him. Jiyong bucked his hips up and forward making it impossible for him to keep still. Seunghyun moaned into Jiyong as he continued undulating against his fully sheathed length.

Jiyong was wild and uninhibited, a radiant and beguiling Lilith-Eve, all coiling limbs around him, tempting him to fall further as he began to move. The slow bucking thrust of Seunghyun’s hips made him lightheaded, all the air leaving his lungs as Jiyong nimbly drew him back in, small gasps and groans coming unbidden as Jiyong pushed up against him repeatedly.

Seunghyun thrust forward, his cock buried deep as he held his position again. As Jiyong’s constricting heat consumed him, he rolled his pelvis against him in a slow arc. Jiyong made the most beautiful high pitched keening as his cock slid against his prostate. Seunghyun surged forward again more forcefully making Jiyong’s pitch increase, his own guttural moans in perfect sync with Jiyong’s.

Seunghyun moved back and slid his hand down Jiyong’s thigh and lifted his leg up onto his shoulder. Jiyong was malleable as Seunghyun adjusted his position so he could easily rock into him using his thigh for leverage. Seunghyun angled himself so each thrust made contact with the little bundle of nerves that made Jiyong sing.

He was so close to being lost to his own pleasure, the slick heat devouring him with each thrust into Jiyong’s tightness that set the tension coiling low in his belly. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold out for much longer.

He reached down and curled his fingers around Jiyong’s leaking erection and began gliding them along his length with slow, steady strokes in time with each protracted roll of his hips. As Seunghyun began stroking, Jiyong’s hand slipped around Seunghyun’s – needing him harder and faster.

Seunghyun couldn’t hold back, he pounded harder into Jiyong, his own moans building in pitch to match Jiyong’s as their joined hands continued to glide along Jiyong’s cock. Each pulsating slip and slide of hip and fist a step closer to that ecstatic, rapturous edge.

Jiyong stilled, breath coming in short gasps before a stuttering low howl broke from him and his back arched off the mattress, pelvis rolling forward against Seunghyun as he hit his crescendo. Every nerve ending sent electric pulses rippling through him as his orgasm wracked his body and blinding white heat flooded his senses.

As Jiyong’s muscles pulsed and tensed around him, Seunghyun hit his own exquisite release hips shuddering and head snapping forward as he bit back a broken sob, fingers digging into the firm flesh of Jiyong’s thigh as he rode out the intense surging waves of his orgasm, hips rocking forward with each quivering pulse.

Breathless and sated, they finally collapsed into a shambolic tangle of sweat and cum-slicked limbs. Jiyong pulled Seunghyun in around him, arms pulled in tight around his middle, a leg slung over his hips as their breathing slowly normalised. Seunghyun kissed the nape of Jiyong’s neck making the smaller man smile in his post-orgasmic haze. Jiyong’s eyes drifted closed as he listened to Seunghyun’s ragged breathing, heart beating wildly against his back.

“You’re fucking amazing, Ji,” Seunghyun rasped in quiet breathy reverence against his throat. Jiyong smiled.

“My god, your o-face. I swear it’s the most fucking intensely beautiful and sexy thing I’ve ever seen.” More delicate kisses planted along his shoulders, breathing still laboured.

“You can talk, my love. I could watch you falling apart like that for the rest of my life,” Jiyong replied smiling as he turned his body in to kiss his lover again.

“You’ll have plenty more chances to see it... if you play your cards right,” Seunghyun teased, mirth shining in his eyes. Jiyong traced his fingers along Seunghyun’s jawline, tongue lining the inside of his bottom lip before he leant up, gripping the skin of his throat with his teeth as he growled playfully.

Seunghyun yelped before Jiyong let go dropping his head back to the mattress, a besotted smile plastered across his lips.

“Oh, is that so, mon petit dragon?” he growled low.

He planted a soft kiss on Ji’s brow and sighed propping his head against his hand.

“Mmm-hmm. And don’t you forget it,” Jiyong smiled up at him.

Seunghyun couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face, dimples on full display. Jiyong was enraptured and reached up to trail a thumb along one of them.

“You’re so beautiful, Jiyong,” sincerity imbued Seunghyun’s words and Jiyong was overcome with emotion. He closed his eyes and pressed his face against Seunghyun’s chest, laying a small trail of kisses against his warm skin.

“I love you,” Seunghyun said quietly as he lifted his chin and leant in to lightly press his lips against Jiyong’s. Jiyong leant up into the soft curve of his mouth before relinquishing his kiss.

“Say it again,” Jiyong bit his bottom lip, grinning sheepishly.

“I love you, Jiyong,” a breathy whisper against his ear that sent a little shiver through him. 

Seunghyun slid his hands down Jiyong’s side and interlaced his long fingers with Jiyong’s. He brought their hands up to his mouth and kissed along each of Jiyong’s knuckles. Jiyong felt his heart swell and an overwhelming affection inundated him, the resultant waves crashing against his ribcage. He figured he could easily lay here forever looking up at Seunghyun, listening to him telling him that he loved him and bathing in the warm glow of his post-coital luminescence.

“I’m going to do my damnedest to make sure you know, for as long as it takes,” the seductive resonance of Seunghyun’s voice and his warm breath ghosting against his ear made Jiyong shudder.

The thunderstorm raged outside, flashes of lightning and cracks of thunder punctuating their words. 

“I think we have a very good case for needing to make up for lost time, beloved,” Jiyong sighed as he leant in to kiss Seunghyun again, tongues swirling together in a slow dance.

It was then that Jiyong realised that Seunghyun tasted like rain and he wanted nothing more than to sink into his sweet saturating depths and drown in his love.

As rain lashed against the windows and the wind howled, lightning flashed and thunder roared as the raging storm battered the outside world, the two fell into a world of their own making.

They pushed and pulled, laughed and cried, fell into and for one another. Jiyong and Seunghyun poured themselves over and into the other like it was the only thing they were ever truly capable of.

Whispered promises of forever were temporarily etched into their skin with nimble fingers, honeyed lips and raking teeth as they made love and fucked until they couldn’t – collapsing against each other, lifeless and wilted. Their bodies harmoniously meshed together, sticky and spent, fingers and limbs entangled and hearts ablaze as they finally slipped into blissful slumber wrapped in the safe haven of each other’s arms.

As the rain fell outside, their dreams were gilded with the endless possibilities of what tomorrow meant.


	6. Chapter 6

Jiyong woke wrapped in Seunghyun’s arms, his face pressed against his chest. Warmth radiated from him and Ji closed his eyes to breathe in his scent, feeling the repetitive rise and fall of his chest against his cheek, the steady heartbeat beneath. Jiyong snuggled in closer and Seunghyun shuffled under him. Jiyong stilled so as not to wake his sleeping prince and settled his head against his chest again, his fingers tenderly tracing indiscriminate patterns across the silky soft skin of his hipbone.

Jiyong couldn’t help the smile that crept over his face. His beautiful Seunghyun was in his arms and he was as beautiful in slumber as he was in waking life. He carefully slid out of his embrace and Seunghyun rolled onto his back. Jiyong took the opportunity to watch him, propping his head up on his hand. He couldn’t get enough of the rhythmic of his breathing making his chest rise and fall, the way his long eyelashes brushed the tops of his cheeks, the steady little breaths issuing between bowed lips. Jiyong leant in close and gently traced a finger across the tip of his nose. He couldn’t resist the urge to plant a gentle kiss on his cheek.

Seunghyun’s eyes slowly fluttered open, deep chocolate orbs blinking up at him. Jiyong smiled broadly at him, “Good morning, baby,” his fingers traced along Seunghyun’s brow. Jiyong was mesmerised and he wondered how it was possible for anyone to look so magnificent after just waking up.

Seunghyun smiled up at Jiyong and replied sleepily: “Morning, sweetheart,” before slipping an arm in around his waist.

Jiyong shuddered at the sound of his gravelly baritone and leant in to slowly brush his lips with his own. Seunghyun responded in kind and pulled Jiyong into him before flipping their positions to pin him to the bed. Jiyong exhaled sharply as Seunghyun’s mouth latched onto the soft flesh at the juncture of his shoulder and throat, sharp teeth raking and tongue swirling on the sensitive spot. Jiyong arched up into Seunghyun, breath becoming short gasps as Seunghyun’s thumb circled a nipple making the flesh harden under his ministrations.

Jiyong rolled his hips up against Seunghyun, their emergent hardness brushing against the other. Seunghyun trailed his lips up Jiyong’s throat and claimed his mouth with a gentle press of his lips, the air forced out of his lungs as Jiyong drove his hips up into him again.

“Well, it certainly is shaping up to be a terrific morning...if you keep that up,” Seunghyun gritted against his ear. Jiyong exhaled slowly and pulled Seunghyun’s hips down to thrust up again. Seunghyun’s eyes closed as he released a small groan against Jiyong’s throat, the sensation sending little jolts of pleasure coursing through him.

“Fuck, you so don’t play fair Ji,” Seunghyun groaned as he continued his rolling assault on his groin, Ji caught his earlobe between his teeth with a little breathy moan.

He released the lobe to plead, “Make love to me, hyung.” Seunghyun pulled back to look into his eyes. Jiyong’s heated gaze gave him no quarter for refusal. He leant in to kiss him and Jiyong undulated under him, the heat and friction becoming almost too much to bear. Seunghyun extricated himself from Jiyong’s delirium-inducing kiss to search around them for the lube and condoms.

He quickly prepared Ji before slipping a condom down over his own hardness and slicking himself with lube. Jiyong writhed and pleaded as Seunghyun kissed him until he couldn’t tell where his lips ended and Jiyong’s began. Seunghyun slowly entered him, Jiyong moaned and arched into him until he was completely enveloped in Jiyong’s heat. Seunghyun moved slow and deliberate, hips rocking in liquid rhythm as Jiyong brayed and whimpered beneath him.

Seunghyun made love to his beautiful leader like he had all night, their bodies merging and colliding as they drove each other to harmonious completion. They reached their blissful crescendos with their passionate cries reverberating within the confines of Jiyong’s bedroom and their burning hearts. As they lay in each other’s arms – sated and fatigued – a new and familiar ache crept into their muscles as the veil of sleep settled over them once more.

*

“Hyuuuung, I need you...” Jiyong moaned as he roused into waking.

Seunghyun’s breath caught in his throat as his eyes flew open at Jiyong’s plea. He couldn’t be fucking serious. Could he?

“Seriously, hyung. I think I need you to carry me to the shower.” Jiyong smiled up at him, biting his lower lip.

Seunghyun huffed out a sigh of relief and laughed. If he was going to ask to go again he was going to pass out. Thank the gods. He considered Jiyong's plea, even though he wasn’t entirely sure his legs would carry himself, let alone the both of them, he’d make the attempt even if he failed. He kissed his forehead as a small token of thanks.

“Come on then, sweetheart, let’s go,” he said as he climbed out of bed and extended his hand to Jiyong. Jiyong crawled to the edge of the bed and beckoned Seunghyun closer. Seunghyun leant down and scooped him up into his arms. Jiyong yelped in surprise at how quickly he’d lifted him from the bed.

“Let’s get you to the bathroom shall we?” Jiyong slung his arms around his neck and nodded sleepily against him. Seunghyun deposited him at the door of the shower. He opened the door and turned the water on. “After you, my prince,” he offered with a small bow. Jiyong rolled his eyes and offered a quiet “dork” as he passed and stepped under the hot spray.

“You coming or is this a party for one?” he grinned at him wickedly and Seunghyun stepped in, closing the door behind him. Jiyong began soaping up and pushed Seunghyun back ordering him to turn around. He did as he was asked as Jiyong set to work cleaning his back.

He spent a fair amount of time cleaning his backside, his soapy hands swooping over each delicious curve repeatedly before Seunghyun interjected: “Ahem, I think you got it, honey.”

“Oh, I know. I’m just taking my sweet time. Didn’t realise you had somewhere you needed to be, hyung,” they both laughed as continued his important work before making his way down the backs of his legs. Seunghyun twitched when Ji’s fingers trailed across the back of his knees. Duly noted, he thought smiling to himself.

Ji stood and pulled Seunghyun back a few paces to rinse him off before he swivelled him around one-eighty. He washed his chest, arms and stomach and down his legs before repeating the process of rinsing him off. Jiyong quickly washed himself and Seunghyun pouted with a little “Hmmph! I thought it was my turn?”

Jiyong rinsed and smirked at him. “Oh, but it is your turn sweet boy,” he husked against his ear, pulling him in close.

“Oh yeah?”

“Uh-huh,” Jiyong whispered before he kissed him slow, his hand slipped down his torso and he curled his fingers around his emerging erection. Jiyong worked his cock until he was fully erect again. Seunghyun’s breathing became ragged, needy little gasps between Jiyong’s lips. Jiyong slipped to his knees, placing butterfly soft kisses around his groin until Seunghyun pleas became desperate and Jiyong relented.

Jiyong wrapped his lips around the tip, tongue swirling around the glans before he moved his head down to take him wholly into his mouth. Seunghyun moaned loudly as Jiyong worked him into a frenetic state with his mouth and his fingers. With each plunging motion of his mouth, Seunghyun bucked his hips forward to meet him, the tip of his cock making blissful contact with the back of his throat.

Jiyong continued his fevered work on his shaft until Seunghyun was a moaning wreck. Jiyong upped the anti by gingerly circling a finger against the puckered ring of muscle. Seunghyun’s cries increased at the sensation, it was becoming too much. Overstimulation was making him delirious and close to losing his mind. Jiyong gently inserted a long finger and began pistoning and crooking the digit in time with his heads motion. Seunghyun bucked into his hot mouth, the tightening coil of his orgasm gave way as he came with Jiyong’s name falling from his lips.

Jiyong extracted himself and watched as Seunghyun slipped down the tiled wall, his legs refusing to keep him upright as the last pulses of his climax ebbed out of him.

“Holy fuck... that... was beyond... incredible.” Seunghyun panted, breathless and spent as the water washed over him, his eyes soft and unfocused.

“Pleasure was all mine, gorgeous. Now, let’s get you dry so I can make you fall apart again,” Jiyong offered him a hand to pull him to his feet and kissed him languidly as he turned the water off. 

They dried themselves off and brushed their teeth, Jiyong giving Seunghyun one of the millions of new unused ones he had in stock for when people ended up staying over unexpectedly.

“Always so prepared, Ji,” Seunghyun teased and winked at him. Jiyong glared at him over his toothbrush before he rinsed. He slipped out of the bathroom to find some sleeping pants for Seunghyun. He found the ones with the longest legs that he could, but he doubted that they’d fit properly lengthwise.

He headed back to the bathroom and handed the pants to Seunghyun.

“They’re probably going to be a little short on you, not that you’re going to be in them for long,” Jiyong said, a licentious grin plastered across his face as he openly eyed Seunghyun’s deliciously naked form.

“Is that a fact, little dragon?” Seunghyun raised an eyebrow at him and Jiyong nodded emphatically.

“Just one thing before we do, my insatiable little minx. Coffee?” Seunghyun asked hopefully.

“Let me see what I can rustle up, baby,” Ji replied before he disappeared into the kitchen.

*

Jiyong busied himself setting up the coffee machine that had languished in the pantry for months unused. He found some coffee beans and hoped they weren’t too far out of date (so far, so good).

“You don’t have a coffee syphon?” Seunghyun whined as he sidled up to him, sleep pants perfectly highlighting all of his assets, Jiyong noted before casting him a withering glance.

“You did not just fucking say that,” he huffed. Seunghyun’s eyes lit up at Ji’s unconcealed disdain and he laughed, deep and hearty. Ji would forgive him any transgression if he could only listen to him laugh for the rest of his days.

Ji feigned a scowl with a small shake of his head as he flicked the switch on the percolator. He pulled open the fridge to inspect the meagre contents. “Hmm, looks like we’re either heading out or calling in for breakfast.” His stomach growled loudly in protest. It had been nearly fourteen hours since either of them had eaten.

Jiyong’s grabbed his phone to make the call and it flashed with an unread message. He unlocked it and his face fell. It was a message from his manager. He dropped his phone onto the bench and cradled his head in his hands when he’d finished reading the text.

“What is it, Ji?”

“Check your phone. You’ve probably got the same message. They’re calling us in to work on a video shoot. It’s for a re-release in Japan.” Jiyong sighed.

“When?”

“Meeting is in three days time,” he slumped against the kitchen bench.

Seunghyun stood to pull Jiyong in close, his thumbs tracing across his cheekbones as he looked into his eyes.

“It’ll be fine. We’ll get it over and done with. Then you’re mine until we have to go back to work proper, okay?” Seunghyun leant down to gently press his lips against the younger man's’ momentarily.

Jiyong pulled back, leaning his head against Seunghyun’s shoulder and nodded with a disappointed pout as he relished the warmth of his lovers' bare skin against his cheek.

“I suppose you’re right,” he sighed heavily, “and that means we’re calling in because I’m not letting you out of my sight until I absolutely have to.” Jiyong leant up to gently capture Seunghyun’s bottom lip between his teeth. He lapped at it making the older man release a small hiss. Jiyong released him and Seunghyun sucked the assaulted lip in behind his teeth with a little “ow”.

“Hmmm, let’s see if I can’t change that so we don’t get interrupted,” Seunghyun said and quirked an eyebrow at Ji. He pulled away from Jiyong’s embrace and started rifling through the pantry. “When was the last time you did groceries, Ji?” he asked as he checked the expiry date on a box of cereal.

Ji shrugged, “A little while, I suppose. Why?” 

“It’s okay. I think I can create some magic with what we’ve got here.” Seunghyun offered casually.

“Uhhh, hyung? What exactly are you doing?” Jiyong asked his curiosity fully piqued.

“I’m making you pancakes my love,” he smiled brightly and Jiyong thought his heart would explode. His insanely gorgeous boyfriend was making him pancakes. No one but his mother had ever made him pancakes before. He watched, completely enthralled, with his chin resting on his hands as Seunghyun flitted around his kitchen. He had one of the most amazing nights of his life, which was quickly being followed by an even more incredible morning. He wanted to pinch himself.

When Seunghyun was done, he placed the plate under his nose with a little “ta-da!” Jiyong smiled and said: “Could you be any more perfect?”

Seunghyun thrust his empty coffee cup under Jiyong’s nose with a playful waggling of his brow: “Yes, I probably could. Now coffee me!” Jiyong couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face as he filled his cup with the bitter brown liquid.

They ate their pancakes, and Seunghyun drank his coffee, in relative silence before returning to Jiyong’s bedroom to wring the most they could out of the next few days.

*

Jiyong and Seunghyun took their time saying goodbye, neither wanting to be the first to relinquish their hold on the other. Their bodies firmly pressed together, lips melding slowly, tongues gliding in a delicate rhythm as they kissed as if it would be their last. Jiyong’s phone vibrated letting him know that the driver had arrived and was waiting in the basement of the building. They separated then, their fingers searching and linking together, their bodies instinctively seeking the comfort of the others touch.

Seunghyun sighed. “I should go,” he said as he pulled Jiyong close to him, holding him as though his life depended on it.

“Yeah,” Jiyong sighed and inhaled Seunghyun’s scent, “you should.” They held each other close, eyes closed, gently swaying when Jiyong’s phone vibrated again, breaking the spell. Jiyong whimpered quietly when Seunghyun finally pulled away.

“I’ll call you when I get home, okay, sweetheart?” Jiyong wanted to melt into a puddle every time Seunghyun called him ‘sweetheart’. It made his heart swell and he blushed and grinned each and every time.

“Okay, hyung. You really should go before I drag you back to bed and tie you down,” he smiled impishly at his lover. Seunghyun looked like he was about to choke on air.

“Don’t tempt me,” he grinned as he leant down to press his lips gently against Jiyong’s. “See you tomorrow, sweetheart. And thank you,” he whispered before he opened the door and made his way down to the waiting driver. Jiyong leant against the door, heart thudding heavily in his chest at the physical loss of Seunghyun pressed against him.

Jiyong sighed as his phone vibrated again. He was going to send a message to the driver to let him know that Seunghyun was on his way when he saw it was a message from his beloved hyung. He opened the message that simply said: I love you. Jiyong couldn’t help smiling as he pulled himself away from the door and made the necessary preparations for their return to work tomorrow.

When he finally returned to his (sadly empty) bed for the night, he found a little note slipped under his pillow as he lay down.

_My sweetest Jiyong,_

_I never thought it was possible to love someone as much as I love you and to have that love returned. I don’t know what I would have done if you’d told me you didn’t feel the same that night. It doesn’t bear considering because you didn’t and you do._

_Every day I’m with you is a blessing and my heart sings when I see your beautiful smile. I will do my utmost to make sure you’re always happy._

_For every moment that I’m away from you, I will be counting the endless seconds until I can see you again, sweetheart. Please know that I love you eternally._

_Yours forever and always,_

_Seunghyun._

_X_

Jiyong smiled broadly and rolled over to press his face into his pillow, the warm giddiness bouncing around his insides was too overwhelming. He grabbed his phone from his bedside table to type out a message to his beloved Seunghyun.

_Tonight will be the longest night of my life without you next to me. How will I sleep, hyung? How will I sleep if I’m not wrapped in your arms after we make love? You are my moon and stars. I love you desperately and without end, Seunghyun. Tomorrow can’t be here soon enough. I miss you. -3-_

Jiyong pressed send and within seconds, his phone rang. Seunghyun’s voice reverberated through him and he smiled as he settled back into his bed. They whispered their sweet nothings through the receivers and their open wish to be in each other’s arms again. They talked until Hypnos beckoned and their eyelids were heavy with sleep. They finally bid each other sweet farewells and sweeter dreams and until tomorrows with bright cheeks and warm hearts. 

Seunghyun still had the note in his pocket: _S, Meet me at my apartment, 6:30pm sharp. We need to talk. Don’t be fucking late. J. ___He flattened the note on his bedside table and smiled. If it weren’t for Jiyong taking matters into his own hands, who really knew where they would be now? He thanked the heavens for small mercies as he popped the note inside the drawer.

As slumber finally claimed them in their separate beds, they each dreamt of the other. 

Tomorrow was going to be better and worse - a state of pure ambivalence. They’d be in the company of their colleagues and none would know that their hearts burned bright with a desperate ache that would sweetly corrode them until time allowed them to melt into each other again. 


	7. Chapter 7

The five met at YG headquarters as instructed, all arriving at different times. It had been just over a month since they were last together, so it was going to be good to spend the next couple of weeks together before continuing their respective breaks. Seunghyun was the last to arrive, late like he always was. Except for four days ago, Jiyong bit his lip to keep the giddy little giggle that threatened to burst out of him. His eyes lit up as Seunghyun strode towards them – almost as though the world were his catwalk – as they continued to chat and catch up on what each had been doing for the last little while.

Jiyong couldn’t keep his eyes off of Seunghyun as he walked towards them. Even though he’d only seen him last night, he wanted to run into his arms and kiss him until he couldn’t breathe. Instead, he remained in place and watched as he approached doing his utmost to keep his quiet yearning in check. He was downright resplendent in tight black jeans, a grey long sleeved shirt and thick black-rimmed glasses. Jiyong felt as though he was going to choke on his own tongue.

Seungri broke from the group first, running up to Seunghyun and latching on to him with unrestrained glee. Seunghyun laughed at the maknae’s antics and asked that he let go a little so he could breathe. Seungri relented with a small apology and explained that it was just because he missed his hyung so much.

Youngbae and Daesung approached and each hugged him eagerly, in turn, both excitedly chatting and wanting to know what their hyung had been up to. Jiyong didn’t move. He was incapable. To approach him now would be too much. Seunghyun smirked at him and he felt like he was going to crack. He put on the most serious face he could muster and ordered the others to head into the studio telling them that he and Seunghyun would be there shortly. Once the others were out of sight, Jiyong walked away giving Seunghyun no choice but to follow cautiously. Jiyong rounded a corner with Seunghyun following closely behind.

As he rounded the corner, Jiyong’s arm flashed out and he was dragged into a small empty office, the door slammed shut behind him. Jiyong forced him back against the wall crushing his lips against Seunghyun’s. He leant up into him, his tongue tenderly slipping past the border of Seunghyun’s lips, eagerly tasting him. Traces of coffee, mint and a million things all Seunghyun flooded his senses. Seunghyun caressed his cheek, his lips parting to allow him all the access he needed. Jiyong pushed forward as they kissed, hips compressed together until Seunghyun finally pulled him back, smiling down at his love.

“Morning, sweetheart,” he said as he swept a thumb across Jiyong’s cheek. Jiyong sighed against him as he rested his head against his shoulder.

“Hey, gorgeous. I missed you,” Jiyong said, catching his breath. Seunghyun let out a small rumbling laugh as Jiyong slipped his arms around him and held him close.

“Yeah, I think I got that memo,” he said smirking down at the younger man.

“Aish!” Jiyong retorted with a playful little jab to his ribs, smiling against him.

Seunghyun lifted his chin and kissed him languidly before pulling away.

“I missed you more, Ji,” his eyes expressing his secret yearning. He sighed heavily before lifting Jiyong’s hand to kiss along his knuckles.

Jiyong leant up to press a tender kiss against his lips and whispered: “I love you, Seunghyun.” Seunghyun felt warmth blooming in his chest and radiating through him at Jiyong’s words. No, I’ll never tire of hearing that.

“I love you so much, Jiyong. Let’s get today done so we can get out of here and we can make love until it’s tomorrow again,” Seunghyun breathed against the shell of his air making Jiyong shudder.

“You know these two weeks are going to be the hardest of my life, not being able to touch you as much as I want to, not being able to kiss you,” Jiyong leant up to claim his mouth in a smouldering kiss once again.

Seunghyun manoeuvred him back gently: “God-fuck-Ji, we need to stop or I’m going to take you – right here right now – on that desk,” he pointed behind Jiyong. “Seriously, we need to get out of here. You’re too fucking much, sweetheart,” Seunghyun leant his forehead against Jiyong’s with his eyes closed, breathing heavily. Jiyong reluctantly pulled away from him.

Jiyong cleared his throat and gave himself a little shake before asserting firmly: “Okay, we really really really need to be GD and TOP.”

Seunghyun nodded in understanding. Nothing more needed to be said; they implicitly understood that being at work was going to be difficult and they needed to remember the eyes of the world were on them.

“Follow me in a few minutes. I’ll tell the others that I was... making sure you’d be ready to learn the new choreography in record time,” Jiyong teased. Seunghyun glared at him defiantly.

“Well, I guess they won’t have a hard time swallowing that," Seunghyun bristled. "I’ll remember to occasionally fuck it up to keep in line with what's expected.” Seunghyun folded his arms across his chest.

Jiyong felt his heart clench. T.O.P’s (not Seunghyun’s) bingu-choom status wasn’t for nothing and it was all his own doing. It was a complete ruse and Jiyong knew the truth; he’d always known it. It was something Seunghyun started just to make the others laugh and before long, it became accepted and eventually expected of him. Jiyong immediately regretted that he’d fired off the jibe so carelessly.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, baby. I know you’ve got rhythm in spades, sweet boy,” Jiyong leant in to kiss him again with a gentle roll of his hips against his groin. “Please forgive me,” Jiyong pleaded quietly against his ear.

A little grunt escaped Seunghyun as he gently moved him back.

“I shouldn’t have to remind you, Ji but I will if that’s what it comes down to,” he said, all traces of his momentary ire fading. Jiyong moved to kiss him again and Seunghyun allowed him, responding with the same ardent need.

“Promise?” Jiyong husked against his ear before he moved away. Seunghyun leant back with a broad smile, dimples on full display and Jiyong’s heart skipped a beat.

“You need to go before they send out the search party. I love you, now go!” Seunghyun ordered and Jiyong did as he was asked. Before he left, he looked back and mouthed GD and TOP with a wide grin and thumbs up. Seunghyun laughed and nodded as he shooed him out of the office.

*

The next few days were filled with meetings about the video shoot for Emotion. YGEX was rereleasing a best of in Japan and decided that a relaunch needed a music video. A lot of the work had already been done in their absence so it was a matter of choosing which type of video and the styling they wanted to go with. They’d gone through all the specs and made their choice.

Choreography practice started the following day and they’d go through the motions – including Seunghyun’s orchestrated fumbles – for the next few days until it was time to shoot.

*

Closed Set "Emotion", Day One.

Jiyong was alone for a brief pause; he leant back against the wall and closed his eyes as he tried to calm his breathing. He needed a break, a few minutes to regain his composure. It was a battle he was fast losing.

Today had been particularly hard for Jiyong. They were doing zooming close-ups as part of a club scene. Every time the playback hit Seunghyun’s “Come baby, come baby, come”, he would try not to watch but he was compelled, completely transfixed by Seunghyun on the playback screen. As Seunghyun did his individual pieces to camera, he smouldered – pure molten sin – his eyes conveying all the deliciously wicked ways in which he was going to get you there.

Jiyong had been on the receiving end of each and every one over the past couple of weeks and watching him expressing it in front of the cameras made his insides tremble. Seunghyun licked his lips – salacious and slow – at the end and Jiyong mouthed a silent ‘fuck’. If anyone asked, he would simply say that he was worried about what the censors would think. It wasn’t because Seunghyun had just made all the blood in his body drain directly into his groin.

Since they started work on this project, it seemed that Seunghyun’s bedroom eyes were always trained on him, the easy seduction in his voice, his physical presence, everything about his boyfriend dripped pure sex and it was completely effortless on his behalf. Jiyong found that being in such close proximity made it virtually impossible not to be in a near constant state of arousal and he felt utterly helpless against his visceral reactions. Right now, he wanted to curse the makeup artists and the coordi-noonas for their brilliant work in making his ludicrously sexy lover even hotter.

His dark feline eyes were emphasised to perfection, his hair coiffed just so and they’d poured him into black PVC pants with a long black fitted dress coat. It was too much. Every infinitesimal fibre of Jiyong’s being wanted to jump his bones right then and there, to dig his fingers into those perfect thighs, sink his teeth into the soft flesh of his throat while he fucked him senseless until beautiful and filthy litanies fell from those sweet lips and white-hot lava poured from him. 

If this was a test, he was going to fail spectacularly. He swallowed thickly and left the studio to regain some composure. It seemed that Seunghyun had other ideas about Ji getting any respite. When the director called for everyone to take twenty Seunghyun took his opportunity to find Jiyong. When he found him in the hallway, he decided to do something with the few minutes they had to themselves.

Seunghyun swept past him with a devious smirk. He reached out and grabbed Jiyong’s wrist breaking his silent musing. Jiyong looked around to see if anyone would see them and thankfully no one was in sight. Jittery anticipation rebounded around his insides as he followed. Seunghyun dragged him into an empty dressing room forcing Jiyong back against the door, his lips latching onto the soft flesh of his throat. Jiyong moaned under him as Seunghyun moved to claim his lips, tongue sweeping into his mouth as he pulled him into a blistering kiss.

Jiyong moaned as he pushed him back. “Baby, we can’t--” he began half-heartedly, his resolve quickly crumbling. Seunghyun drove his hips forward again pinning him against the door, dark eyes locking Jiyong in a fiery gaze. His fingers found their way under his shirt as he continued his heated ministrations, his eyes challenging Jiyong to stop him as his tongue ran in a slow sweep across the seam of his lips. Jiyong was hypnotised, his eyes followed Seunghyun’s tongue along its slow path, hips slanting forward involuntarily. Seunghyun knew exactly how to get his way and Jiyong relented with a husky “Please...” Seunghyun rocked his hips forward, the friction sending pleasurable little jolts splintering out from his groin as Jiyong closed his eyes.

Seunghyun pushed his knee in between Jiyong’s legs moving them apart and he complied wordlessly, needing the friction. Anything. He was impossibly hard and out of his mind with intense desire as Seunghyun kissed slow trails along his throat, his hands busying themselves unbuckling Jiyong’s belt and slipping his pants down.

Seunghyun dropped to his knees palming Jiyong’s aching hardness through his boxers. He inhaled sharply at the contact his head snapped back against the door as his eyes fluttered closed. “God Seunghyun, please,” he whimpered as he continued to caress him through the restrictive fabric.

Seunghyun flicked his eyes up at Jiyong, seven layers of smoky sin bored into him as he spoke. “Shhhh. Don’t you worry about a thing, sweetheart.”

With that, he slipped Jiyong’s boxers down exposing his erection. Without another word, Seunghyun’s lips were wrapped around the tip of Jiyong’s cock; tongue teasing along the leaking slit swallowing down his precum. Jiyong hissed and bit down on his bottom lip at the sensation of Seunghyun’s hot mouth closing around him.

Seunghyun took all of Jiyong’s length in one swift motion making Jiyong bite back a moan, the slick heat threatening to undo him in no time at all. Jiyong bucked his hips forward as Seunghyun swallowed him, his length deliciously suctioned between his tongue and the back of his throat. Jiyong was fast losing control, the intense heat of Seunghyun’s mouth surrounding him as he began to move, his tongue swirling around the underside of his manhood; throaty little whimpers breaking from him as his body tensed under his lover's skilful attentions.

Seunghyun wrapped his fingers around the base of his cock to stroke him in time with his head’s movements as he started humming low. The reverberation of Seunghyun’s deep drone tingled at the base of his spine making him an incoherent wreck as he fell apart. Jiyong’s hips snapped forward and he bit down on his lip to stifle the guttural roar lodged in his throat as he came. Seunghyun kept up his punishing suction until the last pulse was wrung out of him. Jiyong slid to the floor, his entire body vibrated and hummed. Seunghyun swooped in crushing his lips and flicked his tongue inside his mouth, kissing him hard and urgent as Jiyong tried to catch his breath.

Jiyong tasted himself on the back of his tongue and it made him giddy. Seunghyun pulled back, smirking at him. He looked exactly like the cat that got the cream and Jiyong chuckled at the thought, considering what they’d just done. Jiyong quickly redressed and Seunghyun pouted momentarily before the wicked Cheshire grin reappeared.

“What... was... that... for?” Jiyong panted as he readjusted himself in his sitting position, his tongue flicking between his lips.

“Well, you looked like you needed a little something to help you relax. You’ve been as twitchy and tense as an alley cat all day so I figured I’d... uh... help relieve some of that tension,” Seunghyun purred low making Jiyong’s breath hitch.

“Mmf, not my fault,” he whined, bottom lip jutting out in his signature pout. “Not with you being so incredibly fucking hot and the coordi-noonas dressing you in the tightest PVC pants known to man!” Ji moaned wantonly as he slid a finger along his inner thigh to emphasise his point. Seunghyun closed his eyes as a small breathless whimper escaped him. He grabbed Jiyong’s hand and pushed it away before it got any higher. Seunghyun met his eyes again with a small admonishing click of his tongue.

“Ooh, we don’t have time for that right now, sweetheart. They’ll be calling us back to set soon. Couldn’t have you running around giving the game away. Your poker face could use a little work, Ji,” Seunghyun smiled and quirked an eyebrow at him. Fucker. Jiyong smacked his arm making him laugh.

“I’m going to make it up to you in so... many... ways my love,” Jiyong responded, half-lidded eyes locked on Seunghyun’s with his bottom lip caught behind his teeth as he pulled Seunghyun in to recapture his lips. Seunghyun smiled against him. He knew Jiyong would, in abundance and then some, and he could barely fucking wait. He pulled Jiyong on top of him and kissed him like they had all the time in the world, his arms pulling him in tight, tongues languidly exploring new and familiar territory.

Before long, they were being called back to set. Seunghyun brought a finger up to his lips as footsteps approached. They both quickly rearranged themselves in the mirror making sure everything that had fallen out of place was firmly back in its correct position. No, nothing’s been going on here.

Seunghyun motioned that he would leave first and that Jiyong should follow a few minutes later when the coast was clear. He reclaimed Jiyong’s mouth again in a chaste press of lips, his tongue softly tracing along the edge of his bottom lip making Jiyong push up into the kiss.

"GD and TOP, remember? We got this, baby," he said quietly and Jiyong nodded.

Seunghyun quickly pulled away and kissed his forehead. He kept Jiyong behind the door as he quickly slipped out of the room and raced back to the set. Jiyong waited, his head back against the door, his entire body tingling from their brief encounter.

He knew this was going to be difficult but until today had no clear concept of just how difficult. Seunghyun was right; he was going to have to work on maintaining G-Dragon and keeping his hunger for Seunghyun in check when they were at work. If only he could convince his body to co-operate, he’d be fine. Jiyong was convinced that it wasn’t his fault that Seunghyun made him feel like a horny teenager all the time.

After a few minutes, he slipped out of the dressing room and made his way back to the set to film his close-ups. The makeup artist was making a few final touches to make sure everything was in place before they started. She grinned at her work before she flitted away again. A smirk played on Jiyong’s lips when he saw Seunghyun sitting behind the playback desk. Poker face, huh? We’ll see about that, Jiyong smirked to himself. The director called for quiet on set and to start rolling playback. Jiyong looked directly down the barrel knowing full well that Seunghyun wouldn’t be able to look away.

Jiyong pulled out all the stops – all the things he did to get under Seunghyun’s skin were all on show. When the director called “Cut!” Jiyong cast a sly glance over at Seunghyun who was squirming uncomfortably in his seat while doing his utmost to look the exact opposite of bothered with little success. Hook, line and sinker, Jiyong thought as a triumphant little chuckle bubbled out of him.

“Perfect, Jiyong! We might just call you one-take Kwon if you keep that up.” The director smiled and clapped a hand on his shoulder refocussing his attention. Jiyong bowed his full ninety-degrees and thanked him.

“I don’t know what your motivation was, but your fans are seriously gonna lose their collective shit when this comes out. Between you and Seunghyun, the fans are gonna go wild over this one. That was some seriously hot stuff, man. Good job!” The director beamed at him and Jiyong bowed again, grinning widely.

The director turned to the cast and crew. “OK, that’s a wrap for today people. See you all on set at seven-thirty tomorrow morning!” Jiyong was making his way over to Seunghyun to revel in his little victory but Daesung, Youngbae and Seungri had already gathered at his side. Jiyong swallowed it down; there’d be time to review today’s events later. He sent them off to their dressing rooms to get changed and told them to meet him at the stage door in fifteen.

He needed to get them out of here before Seungri starting complaining about the lack of food and how his stomach was going to collapse in on itself if he didn’t eat again soon. He also wanted to get their meal over and done with so he could make his excuses and slip away to be with Seunghyun for the night. The prospect made his pulse flutter and he smiled. Jiyong marched them all out to the van, waiting for Seunghyun to go last. When the others were well out of sight he playfully slapped his pert behind, making the elder yelp in surprise.

“Hey! What was that for?” he asked incredulously as he rubbed the tingling spot on his backside.

“Consider it an act of foreplay, baby. Weren’t you taught to never start what you couldn’t finish?” Jiyong whispered behind his hand and batting his eyelashes before following the others out into the night, leaving Seunghyun staring at his back open-mouthed. Jiyong turned and held his hands up in surrender mouthing a silent, not my fault. Seunghyun shook his head and laughed as he finally made his way into the van behind him.

They found a small restaurant not far from the studio where they ate and drank and toasted the day’s success. The five were together again even it was for a short time. They talked about what they planned to do with the rest of their time off when they finished the shoot, poked fun at each other and told lame jokes like they always did and likely always would.

Jiyong’s heart swelled in their company. He hadn’t realised that he’d missed the five of them together like this and he looked forward to whatever the future would bring, with all of them, and in particular with his beloved Seunghyun, by his side. He knew in his heart that they’d all be fine and he smiled broadly before shouting for another raucous soju toast.

As they sat together in a small non-descript restaurant in the back streets of Seoul, anticipation coiled low in Seunghyun’s belly and beat a staccato rhythm in his veins as he counted down the hours until he could finally be secreted away with Jiyong to disintegrate in the arms of his love.


	8. Chapter 8

After months of editing and repackaging and releasing teaser dates and having those dates pushed back repeatedly due to scheduling conflicts, the music video for Emotion was finally being released. Days prior to the worldwide release, there was a pre-release and viewing party at YG headquarters. A few days later, they would all head to YGEX in Japan and repeat the process.

Tonight, the little group of five would be together once more. The party started at 7:30pm according to the invites they’d received the week prior. Jiyong had been trying to convince Seunghyun for the better part of the afternoon that they should really get out of bed and start getting ready without much success. He glanced over at the clock beside the bed. The blue numbers taunted him. It was 4:47pm and he knew they would need to be there early to deal with press and media. Jiyong let out a small groan of frustration at having to leave their blissful cocoon to face the world again.

Meanwhile, Seunghyun couldn’t keep his hands or lips off of him. He trailed his mouth along Jiyong’s jaw and down his throat, peppering the soft flesh with delicate kisses making the younger man arch and gasp under him.

“Baby—” a broken distracted whimper, “We... need... to... uhhh! ... get... ready...” his words punctuated with husky little moans as Seunghyun continued to wring pleasure from his flesh with his skilled mouth and fingers.

Seunghyun knew he was right, but the intensity of his passion for the man writhing beneath him dominated his reason. They’d be late and fuck the consequences because right now he had one sole purpose and nothing would sway him from his mission. He murmured a low “uh-huh,” against his skin as he continued to caress him; the pads of his fingers tracing filigreed patterns across the burning planes and curves of Jiyong’s skin. Jiyong succumbed to his ministrations as his needy little gasps and whimpers increased. 

Seunghyun lips twitched into a small grin against his skin, “You want me to stop, sweetheart?”

“Don’t you... fucking dare... stop, baby,” Jiyong pleaded and rocked his hips in a slow arc against him before pulling Seunghyun up to kiss him again.

Seunghyun gently swiped his tongue across Jiyong’s mouth, a small grin teasing the corners of his lips as he did. He flicked his tongue gingerly across his bottom lip, then the top repeating the flicking motion in turn. Jiyong grew agitated at Seunghyun’s little game and caught his tongue between his teeth at the next teasing swipe. Seunghyun yelped in surprise before Jiyong sucked the captured muscle back into his mouth. Seunghyun kissed him earnestly, the silken slide of his tongue against Jiyong’s setting him further alight. 

Seunghyun pulled back and quickly slicked his fingers with lube as Jiyong rocked his hips in a slow circle against him again, his head dropping back giving Seunghyun a breathtaking view of the delectable expanse of soft honeyed flesh before him. They didn’t have much time but Seunghyun was never going to rush preparing Jiyong no matter how much he whined or whimpered or begged or told him they’d be late. Seunghyun’s breath caught in his throat as Jiyong slammed down against his fingers, head thrown back, mewling and writhing. He was beyond beautiful and Seunghyun could have selfishly fallen apart right then and there.

Once Ji was adequately prepared, Seunghyun slowly entered him, the air always sucked from his lungs each and every time he pushed into his tight heat. Jiyong stilled as Seunghyun slowly pressed forward, fingers gripping Jiyong’s hips so hard as he filled him that they would no doubt leave tell-tale bruises tomorrow. Seunghyun slowly pulled Jiyong up so that he was straddling his lap, Seunghyun’s favourite position.

“Move, baby. I’m ready,” Jiyong panted and leant in to kiss him fiery and slow. Seunghyun slowly rolled his pelvis up while pulling Jiyong down onto his length.

They made slow passionate love for the third time today. They swore after this time, they would get out of bed and start getting ready.

*

“Hyung! Stop fidgeting!” Jiyong admonished as Seunghyun twitched in his grasp.

“Just hurry up and stop pulling it so tight,” Seunghyun shot back impatiently and slapped at his lightening fast hands in frustration.

“Aish! How am I supposed to make it straight if you keep moving? Now,” Jiyong inspected his work with a self-satisfied grin, “that’s much better. Perfect, if I don’t mind saying so myself!”

Seunghyun quirked an eyebrow at his boyfriend and turned to the mirror to inspect the work for himself. He had to admit that he was right. His tie was sitting perfectly – almost as if the fabric had no choice but to obey the instructions laid down by Jiyong’s nimble fingers.

Seunghyun turned to face him again and pulled him in close, arms circling his waist.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he husked against his ear before leaning his head down to press his lips against the corner of his mouth sweetly. Jiyong pushed him back giving him a demure pout.

“Stop it or we’ll never get out of here, gorgeous,” Jiyong flicked his eyes up at him and Seunghyun’s face lit up with a wicked grin. Jiyong quickly shut him down with a small amused scowl.

“You’re insatiable!” Jiyong teased as Seunghyun pulled him close again.

“Can you blame me, beautiful?” he asked hoarsely as he caressed his cheek, his eyes conveying all the ways in which he adored him. Jiyong felt his heart quiver under Seunghyun’s loving gaze. “Just look at you. I can’t help it,” he said tenderly as he cupped Jiyong’s face and drew him in for an affectionate kiss.

Jiyong eventually broke away, his face flushed and his amplifying desire for his love barely concealed. It simmered under the surface of his skin and threatened to overwhelm him.

“That’s not exactly playing fair, baby. We’re going to be... late... and... and...,”

Seunghyun leant back with his arms folded across his chest, tongue ghosting across his bottom lip as he waited for Jiyong to finish his sentence. Jiyong was lost for words, his eyes drawn to his lovers’ mouth and the brief flash of pink just beyond those finely bowed lips. He felt his throat go dry and he swallowed thickly in a desperate attempt to work some moisture back into his mouth. Jiyong’s phone buzzed in his pocket, almost on cue, and broke his trance.

“Shit. I need to go. He’s waiting for me downstairs,” he said matter-of-factly. Seunghyun nodded, smiling deviously as he approached him again.

“C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s get you out of here before I change my mind—” he stopped mid-sentence when Jiyong glowered at him.

“Hyunnie, don’t start,” Jiyong whined, waggling a finger at him. “Tonight is going to be hard enough, so just hold that thought until later when I can do something about it, sweet boy.”

Seunghyun chuckled and beamed at him, dimples on show. Jiyong wanted to drown in the flood of warmth that swirled in his chest whenever Seunghyun smiled at him that way. He was breathtakingly beautiful – as ever his Eros incarnate – dressed in a gorgeous black Armani suit and it took every inch of Jiyong’s willpower to walk away from him now.

Jiyong moved to pull the front door open but Seunghyun held it closed.

“Nope. I’m afraid you didn’t pay the toll,” he said with a wolfish grin. Jiyong turned to face him and rolled his eyes. Seunghyun really could be an insufferable dork and it only served to make him love him more intensely than he already did. Jiyong smiled, knowing full well what the toll was but asking, and wanting it, anyway.

Seunghyun leant in to press his lips against Jiyong’s. It was sweet and delicate and Jiyong felt a little whimper break unbidden from him when Seunghyun pulled him close and tentatively licked at the seam of his lips. Jiyong slid his hands around his neck to hold him closer still.

Seunghyun pulled back, smiling down at him. “I love you, Ji.”

“I love you too, Hyun,” Jiyong replied as his heart swelled and thundered against his ribs, his hands sliding down his boyfriends’ impeccably clothed torso.

“You should really go, Ji. I’ll see you there, sweetheart,” Seunghyun sighed and kissed his forehead and slid his arms from his waist before stepping back looking sheepish and insanely adorable. Jiyong steeled himself as he quickly made his escape, the door closing firmly behind him. He checked his reflection in the lift to make sure his face wasn’t too flushed by the time he got down to the car.

While they paid their 24-hour on call secret security drivers in cash to keep their movements under wraps, they tried to be discreet in terms of not giving too much away. They figured that if the exorbitant amounts they paid were enough to keep them silent, they were acutely aware that there might also be others willing to pay more for them to divulge what they knew. They understood that discretion was paramount.

Jiyong climbed into the car and gave his directions back to his apartment where he was due to be collected by a different driver and taken to the event. He was filled with a mixture of overwhelming love for Seunghyun; his lips still tingling where Seunghyun’s had been minutes ago, and excitement for tonight’s event. At least his band mates and work colleagues would keep him occupied while they were at YG headquarters.

Except for the fact that they were premiering the music video for Emotion. His chest tightened when he realised he’d be watching Seunghyun on huge screens around the office. He’d be reliving the events from that day all over again and in full view of his band mates and colleagues. He took a few deep breaths to steady his nerves and steel his resolve. He quickly raced to his apartment to await the call from the next driver, which gave him time to gather himself for the night ahead.

*

The five were together again and were the shining stars of the show. They’d each arrived separately and in fairly quick succession. The gathered crowd applauded their arrival as blinding camera flashes made everything as bright as midday, burning their retinas as they stopped to pose for photos before they made their way inside. The three eldest had their sunglasses firmly in place to protect them from the onslaught, the maknaes never did so it took them a little while to adjust once they were inside.

They were quickly ushered into the party at the top floor. More polite applause as the lift doors opened and they were welcomed inside. Before long, the president had called them up on stage to share a few words about the music video they were about to debut. Seungri hogged the limelight and had the assembled crowd eating out of the palm of his hands. Jiyong smiled at the youngest giving him a congratulatory thumbs up. Not least at the memory of the party Seungri had taken them to a couple of years ago that started everything.

Once the introductory speeches were concluded, a screen descended from above the stage and the room darkened. The screen bloomed to life with four little pips signalling the opening sequence as they each took their seats in front.

At the opening bars of the song hit, the room started clapping along to the beat cheering as each of them appeared. Both Seunghyun and Jiyong watched with rapt attention at each other’s smouldering sensuality on screen. Jiyong bit the inside of his lip so hard he swore he tasted blood. Seunghyun held his breath, seemingly losing the ability to regulate his breathing when he did draw oxygen into his lungs. Thankfully, no one was paying them any mind at that point.

The room erupted with wild applause and cheers at the conclusion of the music video and the lights came back up. Jiyong noted that most of the room had watched in excitable awe. Seunghyun’s heated gaze on-screen had a number of female staff members discreetly fanning themselves while Jiyong chewed on his bottom lip to try to keep his own rising heat in check.

Jiyong recalled the director’s words all those months ago and he was right. The fans really were going to lose their shit. Of course, it was given a 19+ rating, as they always suspected and with good reason. They all looked incredible and dripped undeniable carnality on screen. The choreography was incredibly suggestive as was intended and they all hit their marks perfectly. It was going to be a runaway success.

As the night wore on, the constant crush of people wanting their attention was starting to wear thin. Jiyong needed some air so headed out to one of the balconies to be alone. Seunghyun found his way out to be by his side shortly thereafter. He leant up against the railing next to him as they looked out into the night.

“I wish this night was over already,” Seunghyun huffed out, an amused smirk spreading across his lips.

“Yep,” was all Jiyong could manage in response. Seunghyun seemed to know exactly what was on Jiyong’s mind. Probably, if not definitely, because the same thing was on his. It was still hard wanting each other as much as they did and not being able to act on it in a public arena, but it was getting easier. Not by much, but they were coping. When they were secreted away from the world, they more than made up for it.

“No doubt the others will wanna kick on, I’m sure we can find reasonable excuses to leave. Like we always do,” Seunghyun said the last part with a cautious glance over his shoulder and Jiyong laughed.

“Yeah, I’m sure we will,” he responded, sucking his bottom lip in behind his teeth. Seunghyun shook his head at him.

“Unfair!” he pointed at him and laughed deep and throaty. Jiyong sighed at the sound as it reverberated through him, a little shiver travelling down his spine. They heard the door opening behind them and were quickly joined by Youngbae.

“What’s unfair, hyung?” he asked Seunghyun smiling.

“Nothing important, dongsaeng. Ji was just being cruel and unusual. I’m heading back in,” he said, clapping his hand on Youngbae’s shoulder and smiling at Jiyong. Jiyong nodded as he made his way back inside as he cast his eyes over the luminescence of the city beneath them.

“Everything okay, Ji?” Youngbae asked his voice tinged with concern.

“Everything’s brilliant, Bae. More than I could have ever anticipated,” Jiyong responded brightly.

“Awesome. You coming back in?” Youngbae asked.

“Yeah, I just need a minute. Go ahead, I’ll be there soon,” Jiyong smiled as he turned to face Bae. “Keep an eye on that maknae, okay?” Youngbae laughed and nodded as he pulled the door open and disappeared inside.

Jiyong turned to face the city again. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Everything really was brilliant and he thanked his lucky stars for whatever it was he did to deserve this life and Seunghyun’s love.

*

They had taken some time into settling into the mantle of boyfriends and lovers, but it felt like the most natural thing in the world. None of their band mates or colleagues knew that ‘the thing that they sometimes did’ when they were out had developed into a far more enduring and marvellous something. Not just yet.

They found a way to inhabit the old patterns of feigned indifference when it was necessary. It was difficult at first, given how hard it was to willingly extract themselves from each other, but it had almost become second nature whenever they were in public. The stark contrast between their public and private lives always gave them a little thrill.

Behind closed doors, small details became their private language. The way Seunghyun loved falling asleep to Jiyong stroking the inside of his wrists, long fingers delicately tracing intricate patterns along the sensitive skin. The way Jiyong squirmed and giggled as Seunghyun trailed delicate kisses along the insides of his ankles and the curve of his instep.

Jiyong revelled in the fact that he gets all of Seunghyun to himself, not just the public persona but the most secret and intimate parts of him. Secret skin that is never on show, skin that only he gets to see. He knows that it’s just for him and always will be.

*

Whenever work drew them apart, Seunghyun made a small ritual of placing one of the matching gold Cartier love cuffs around his left wrist and the turquoise band around his right before kissing each of his eyelids, the tip of his nose and the corners of his lips.

“Never forget, I’m here,” Seunghyun said as he pressed his lips against the pulse points on each of Jiyong’s wrists. “And here,” he said as his lips gently grazed his throat, his tongue languidly teasing the soft flesh making Jiyong shudder and sigh. “And most important of all, here,” he would say as he laid a dizzying trail of kisses from his neck down against his left pectoral above his heart.

As cheesy as it was, it always made Jiyong smile, little currents of elation swirled through him whenever Seunghyun repeated the little ritual – their ritual – when work loomed. Jiyong always promised that he could never forget as he linked his fingers with Seunghyun’s and kissed him affectionately.

Jiyong and Seunghyun had also made pacts to ensure that they reconnected as soon as humanly possible whenever they had to be apart due to their rigorous schedules.

When being in the midst of work got too much and a sly smile or a smouldering glance simply couldn’t convey their overwhelming affection, when they needed simple contact, it was easy to pass it off as fan service. A lingering glance, a tender brush of fingers, or a protective arm slipped around a tiny waist. One would overreact and push the other away, smiling widely and laughing at the lengths they’d go to just to get close. It became a little game to see how far they could push.

Sometimes, they’d turn their affectionate attentions on the maknaes just to make them squirm. Seungri always made the biggest fuss whenever Seunghyun made a beeline for him, gripping him in an overly tight embrace or roughing him up. Daesung was a little less concerned about his hyungs amorous attentions and was able to hold his own if – and often when – the roughhousing commenced. Youngbae would just look on and shake his head, laughing at the scenes playing out before him and was silently thankful that the maknaes were the focus of their affectionate pranks.

*

Every time they were thrust into the limelight, either together as a group or separately, they’d blaze under blinding lights with their band mates, in the eyes of the world and in the company of their colleagues. Their clandestine love silently coiling around their hearts and thrumming in their veins, mute and undetected by the world at large.

Only the keenest of observers may have detected the minute nuances in their body language, all the little things that spoke volumes about how deep in this they both are. Said observers might also note how much brighter they smiled and how their eyes lit up in the presence of the other. How a longing glance may have lingered for a split second too long, how roseate blooms stained their cheeks as a result and the quiet hand-hidden giggles that constantly threatened to give way and erupt into raucous laughter at any given moment.

But only the most observant would notice the little things that were expertly concealed from prying eyes. This was the secret language between Jiyong and Seunghyun, as it was and as it would continue to be and it was as natural as breathing to them.

When time permitted, fingers reacquainted themselves with the plains and dips of heated skin; tongues busied themselves savouring their taste as they expressed their love in ravenous slow motion. They fell apart together as they sunk into the downy depths of their love, wrapped in the cocoon of exquisite passion until sleep claimed them.

And in the serene spaces, they often fell into after making love and right before they fell asleep as they settled into the warm embrace of their hearts’ desire, they would often give up silent prayers of thanks to the universe for one another.

~FIN~


End file.
